Band 7.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-07-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 7.5)

In a few cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything they desire if they work hard enough. While I acknowledge that this saying may put pressure on children, I largely believe that the advantages of saying this to children outweighs the disadvantages.

One major reason is that it is more likely for children to become motivated to achieve their goals. Is it possible for children to believe that no matter how ambitious their dreams are, they will be able to convert them into reality as long as they put enough hard work. As a result, the kids will learn to persist when they are faced with challenges in life. Many recent studies have shown that youngsters who were told that hard work was key grew up to become more resilient and determined compared to kids who were not told this.

Nevertheless, children may push themselves too hard. A child who believes that they have no limits to what they can accomplish may grow up to become adults who work themselves tirelessly. This could potentially lead to burn-out and take a major toll on a person's physical and mental health. To add on, it can be very frustrating and stressful for a child when they push themselves to achieve a goal and are not able to meet their expectations. Consequently, they might feel inadequate about themselves, possibly reducing their self-esteem.

To conclude, motivating children by telling them that hard work is key to success can be extremely beneficial as long as they are reminded that hard work should not come at the expense of their overall wellbeing. It is important for more children to grow up in environments that encourage them to work hard but help them learn when to take breaks.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response7.5
Coherence and Cohesion7.5
Lexical Resource7.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy7.0
Overall7.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.5

You have addressed all parts of the prompt by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of the message. Your position is clear from the introduction and is maintained throughout the essay. The ideas are relevant and generally well-supported, particularly the point regarding resilience versus the risk of burnout. To reach a higher band, ensure that your supporting arguments are fully developed; for instance, the second paragraph could benefit from a more concrete example of how this mindset specifically manifests in a child's daily life. Overall, the response is balanced and directly answers the question posed.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear progression of ideas. Each paragraph has a central theme, and you have used cohesive devices such as 'Nevertheless', 'As a result', and 'Consequently' to link your thoughts effectively. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. While the flow is generally smooth, some transitions could be more sophisticated to avoid a slightly mechanical feel. Overall, the structure is clear and easy to follow, meeting the requirements for a Band 7.

Lexical Resource — Band 7.0

You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary to discuss the topic with some precision. Phrases like 'convert them into reality', 'take a major toll', and 'at the expense of' are used effectively. There are some minor inaccuracies in word choice, such as 'work themselves tirelessly', which is slightly awkward; 'work themselves to the bone' or 'overexert themselves' would be more natural. You have attempted to use less common vocabulary, which is good, but there is room to increase the sophistication of your word choices to reach the higher bands.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 7.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While many sentences are error-free, there are some grammatical slips. For example, the sentence 'Is it possible for children to believe that no matter how ambitious their dreams are, they will be able to convert them into reality as long as they put enough hard work' is phrased as a question but functions as a statement, and it is missing a preposition ('put enough hard work into them'). Despite these errors, your meaning is always clear, and the grammar does not impede communication.

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