Band 8.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 8.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-07-31
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?
Student answer (Band 8.0)
In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything they desire if they work hard enough. While I acknowledge that this message may put pressure on children, I largely believe that the advantages of saying this to children outweigh the disadvantages.
One major reason is that it is more likely for children to become motivated to achieve their goals. It is possible for children to believe that no matter how ambitious their dreams are, they will be able to convert them into reality as long as they put enough hard work into them. As a result, the kids will learn to persist when they are faced with challenges in life. Many recent studies have shown that youngsters who were told that hard work was key grew up to become more resilient and determined compared to kids who were not told this.
Nevertheless, children may push themselves too hard. A child who believes that they have no limits to what they can accomplish may grow up to become adults who work tirelessly. This could potentially lead to burn-out and take a major toll on a person's physical and mental health. To add on, it can be very frustrating and stressful for a child when they push themselves to achieve a goal and are not able to meet their expectations. Consequently, they might feel inadequate about themselves, possibly reducing their self-esteem.
To conclude, motivating children by telling them that hard work is key to success can be extremely beneficial as long as they are reminded that hard work should not come at the expense of their overall wellbeing. It is important for more children to grow up in environments that encourage them to work hard but help them learn when to take breaks.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 7.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 8.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 7.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 8.0 |
| Overall | 8.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.5
The response addresses all parts of the prompt, providing a clear position that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. The arguments regarding motivation and resilience are well-developed, as are the counter-arguments concerning burnout and self-esteem. The ideas are extended with logical reasoning, such as the link between high expectations and potential mental health issues. The essay maintains a consistent focus on the prompt throughout, and the conclusion effectively synthesizes the main points while offering a balanced perspective. The development is sufficient for a task of this nature, meeting the requirements for a Band 7.0.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 8.0
The essay is logically organized with a clear progression of ideas. Each paragraph has a central theme, and the transition between the advantages and disadvantages is handled smoothly using the connector 'Nevertheless'. Cohesive devices such as 'As a result', 'To add on', and 'Consequently' are used effectively to link sentences and ideas. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. The flow is natural, and the reader can easily follow the writer's line of reasoning throughout the text.
Lexical Resource — Band 7.5
The vocabulary is sufficient and appropriate for the task. The writer uses a range of topic-specific vocabulary such as 'resilient', 'determined', 'burn-out', and 'inadequate'. While the range is adequate, it could be further enhanced by incorporating more sophisticated collocations or less common lexical items to reach a higher band. There are no significant spelling or word-choice errors that impede communication. The language used is precise enough to convey the intended meaning clearly and effectively.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 8.0
The essay demonstrates a good mix of simple and complex sentence structures. Complex sentences, such as 'While I acknowledge that this message may put pressure on children, I largely believe that the advantages of saying this to children outweigh the disadvantages', are used accurately. The majority of sentences are error-free, and the grammar is generally controlled. Punctuation is used correctly to support the structure of the arguments. While the range of structures is good, further variety in sentence beginnings and more advanced grammatical forms could elevate the score further.
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