Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-08-04

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 5.0)

It is often argue that in some culture, children are encouraged to believe that if work hard and regularly then can achieve anything. while this message has both positive and negative effects. I will discuss advantages and disadvantages in further paragraph with suitable conclusion.

The phenomena, the main advantages of giving advice children this message it motivate to work hard. when they are believe that success depends on their efforts .they are more likely to serious study and practice their skills consistently. This also help become more confidence and determined. To quote an instance, a student, who give some efforts continuously for their study so in exam time it do not have to give more efforts for better result. this belief can encourage children to develop brain storming towards learning and personal growth.

There is a school of thought that this message has also some disadvantages. It may create unbelievable expectation because never success only doing hard work but smart work are more reliable. The without any qualms other factor like a natural ability, opportunity, fortune, teachers as well as family supports also play an important role. For instance, adult may pratice for a match tournament competition for many month but still loss to a more talented competitor. This could make a adult fell that all their hard work was meaningless.

In my analysis, the benifits outweigh the drawbacks telling children that they can achieve anything through has advantages. Therefore children should be encourage to work hard while also understanding that success depends on many various factors.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both the advantages and disadvantages of the prompt. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited and occasionally repetitive. For instance, the argument regarding 'unbelievable expectation' is a good point, but the explanation lacks depth. The position is clear throughout, but the supporting examples, such as the student studying for an exam, are slightly underdeveloped and lack clarity in their expression. To reach a higher band, you should focus on expanding your arguments with more specific, well-explained examples that directly link back to the prompt's core question.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the progression of ideas. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. Phrases like 'The phenomena, the main advantages' and 'The without any qualms' are awkward and disrupt the flow of the text. While there is an overall logical structure, the transitions between sentences are sometimes abrupt or confusing. Improving the variety and accuracy of linking words (e.g., 'furthermore', 'conversely', 'consequently') would significantly enhance the coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task but lacks precision and variety. There are several instances of incorrect word choice and collocation, such as 'unbelievable expectation' instead of 'unrealistic expectations' and 'brain storming towards learning' which is used incorrectly in this context. Additionally, there are spelling errors like 'benifits' and 'pratice'. To improve, focus on learning collocations and using more precise academic vocabulary to express your ideas more naturally and effectively.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. Issues include subject-verb agreement ('a student, who give some efforts'), missing articles ('in some culture'), and awkward phrasing ('it do not have to give more efforts'). While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of errors in basic grammar and sentence construction prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focus on proofreading for subject-verb agreement and consistent tense usage.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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