Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-08-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In this contemporary world, many cultures give a piece of advice to their children that any task can be accomplished, if they work hard. It is widely believe that this statement leads to success. In this essay we will discuss about both advantages and disadvantages of this message.

There are several benefits of encouraging children to work hard such as, it keeps them motivated and gives them a reminder of what needs to be done. Furthermore, trying there best not only results in extraordinary grades but it also a gives sense of responsibility to the adulates. For instance, if parents keep motivating their children to study day and night, leads to better results compared to those who do not talk about working hard.

There are also some drawbacks of pressuring younger generation to try their best, which includes stress and depression. Many children suffers from these challenges when they try their best but still lacks good grades. Additionally, sometimes they might quit because of the burden that their parents are responsible for. For example, if guardians repeated demands hardship and struggle from their child, it can lead to abandoning the tasks, so they can avoid such compliments.

To conclude, while motivating children to work hard enough have several positive results but their are some serious disadvantages that outweighs the benefits. So it is better to not pressurise them with this kind of compliments, instead we should give mentorship and guidance for achieving the missions that are tough and needed to be done in time.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion5.5
Lexical Resource5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The essay addresses both the advantages and disadvantages of the prompt. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the argument regarding 'adulates' (likely meaning adults or adolescents) is unclear, and the explanation of why children might quit is slightly repetitive. While the position is clear, the supporting examples lack depth and specificity. To reach a higher band, you should expand on the psychological impact of this message with more nuanced reasoning rather than relying on general statements. Overall, the response covers all parts of the task but remains at a surface level.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear progression of ideas from the introduction to the conclusion. You use some cohesive devices like 'Furthermore', 'Additionally', and 'To conclude' to link your points. However, some transitions are mechanical, and there are instances where the flow is slightly disrupted by grammatical errors, such as in the sentence 'For instance, if parents keep motivating their children to study day and night, leads to better results'. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring they are used with greater precision would enhance the overall coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision and range required for a higher band. There are several instances of awkward word choices or incorrect terminology, such as 'adulates' instead of 'adolescents' or 'guardians repeated demands hardship'. The phrase 'compliments' is used incorrectly to refer to the message or advice given to children. To improve, focus on learning collocations and ensuring that the words you choose accurately reflect the intended meaning in an academic context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('Many children suffers', 'their are some serious disadvantages') and incorrect sentence construction ('if guardians repeated demands hardship... it can lead to abandoning'). While the meaning is generally clear, these persistent errors in basic grammar and punctuation prevent the essay from reaching a higher band. You should focus on proofreading for subject-verb agreement and ensuring your complex sentences are grammatically sound.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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