Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-08-09
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?
Student answer (Band 5.0)
in modern era, many individual think that adolescence are often told that they can achieve anything if they hard work in their life. in my opinion, children must do smartwork rather than hardwork. i firmly believe that there many advantages for children this message. the reason for my stance explain further following paragraphs.
To begin with, children should need to hard work in daily life. this means they gain there knowlege in studies and it help to score good marks in each and every academic subject. moreover, one thing children must need right guidance person who well experience and expert to provide good guidance to children. for example, in india children watch informative video through online platform and after start to do smartwork as well as hardwork.
additionally, children set there goal in life and start to work in daily routine. it help to easy to achieve to give patince , consisteny and dedigation this are very crucial for them and after result show unbelievable then family as well as family and relatives feel happy. for instance, parents provide motivation to their children and support which help to achieve success in life.
to conclue, children need only right guidance and support to their parents and suggestion. i believe children need to hardwork in initial age and learn skills so they not face diffculty in field for work and any other work.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, which significantly impacts the development of ideas. While you identify a position, the arguments regarding the advantages and disadvantages are underdeveloped and lack depth. You mention the importance of 'smartwork' and 'guidance,' but you do not clearly articulate the specific advantages (e.g., building resilience, ambition) or disadvantages (e.g., potential for disappointment, unrealistic expectations) of the message itself. The response is repetitive and lacks a balanced exploration of the prompt's core question.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the progression of ideas is often unclear due to grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. While some cohesive devices are used (e.g., 'To begin with,' 'additionally,' 'to conclude'), they are often applied mechanically. The referencing is sometimes confusing, such as in the second paragraph where the transition from 'hard work' to 'online platforms' feels abrupt and lacks a logical link to the prompt. Paragraphing is present but the internal structure of the paragraphs is weak.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and repetitive. You frequently use basic terms like 'hard work,' 'good,' and 'help.' There are several instances of incorrect word choice and spelling errors, such as 'patience,' 'consistency,' 'dedication,' and 'conclude.' The range of vocabulary is insufficient to express complex ideas effectively, and the reliance on simple, repetitive phrasing hinders the overall quality of the argument.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including issues with subject-verb agreement ('many individual think'), article usage, and sentence structure. Many sentences are fragmented or lack necessary prepositions. For example, 'children should need to hard work' is grammatically incorrect. While you attempt to use some complex ideas, the lack of control over basic sentence construction means that errors are frequent and occasionally impede the reader's understanding.
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