Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-08-15
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In many countries, promoting children to get anything has become increasingly popular. It is common between the parents that they encouraged their children to work hard such as getting good grades and to achieve life goals, but it sometimes lead to mental stress and also affect physical health. I believe its advantages outweigh the disadvantages because it promotes children growth and innovation.
First and foremost, one clear advantage is that children learn about their failure and they developed them strong to face the difficulties of life. For instance, a few months ago, i set a goal for myself to improve my spoken English and sometime i just feel tired and exhausted but my parents always encouraged me to become consistent and try hard enough. Now i can confidently participate in English conversation. Secondly, it enhance the personal growth of children and strengthens their thinking ability.
However, there are also significant drawbacks associated with this trend. one of the major drawback is that when children want to achieve anything and they struggle day and night, consequently it can lead to mental stress which poses some serious health issues. they spend their whole time on their ambition and did not get enough time to sleep and has bad impacts on their physical health.
In conclusion, although this message sometimes create unrealistic expectations, it offers far more benefits by fostering resilience, a ambition and a positive attitude towards challenges. I believe that there negative consequences can be reduces by setting proper time for sleep
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses both the advantages and disadvantages of the prompt. You clearly state your position in the introduction and maintain it throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. While the advantage of resilience is supported by a personal example, the discussion on disadvantages is a bit repetitive, focusing primarily on stress and health without exploring other potential drawbacks like the pressure of failure or the loss of childhood spontaneity. To reach a higher band, ensure that each point is fully extended with more nuanced reasoning rather than just stating the impact.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear progression of ideas from the introduction to the conclusion. You use basic cohesive devices such as 'First and foremost', 'Secondly', and 'However' to signal transitions. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical, and there are instances where referencing is unclear, such as in the final sentence where 'there' is used instead of 'their'. Paragraphing is present, but the concluding paragraph is incomplete, which affects the overall flow and sense of closure.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'resilience', 'innovation', and 'unrealistic expectations'. However, there are several instances of awkward word choice and collocation errors, such as 'promoting children to get anything' (which is unclear) and 'developed them strong'. Additionally, there are minor errors in word formation, such as 'a ambition' instead of 'an ambition'. While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding your message, they limit the precision and sophistication of your writing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text. Issues include subject-verb agreement ('it sometimes lead', 'it enhance', 'message sometimes create'), incorrect verb tenses, and missing articles. For example, 'one of the major drawback' should be 'one of the major drawbacks'. While you are able to communicate your ideas, the frequency of these errors is noticeable and occasionally distracts from the content. More attention to proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy would significantly improve your score.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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