Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-08-16

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Some people believe that minors can achieve anything by their efforts. Good practice and guidance leads them to achieve their aims while trying other culture they may change their direction of life.

First and foremost, practice make the teenager a perfect. This is because the skill and competence is gain by continuous efforts. For example, children cannot be upgrade skill swimming only by the courses. For this, minor have to divide themselves into the water. They will face the challenge about the breathing and gradually they will learn. Further the guidance is crucial for tracking their progress. The various ethics aware the children from water resources relating to culture.

On the other hand, children are misguided by certain culture. This is because most of the digital platform. For instance; By watching the different movies from different websites. Teens try copy the bad habits such as drug activities, other culture etc. This may be leads by curisoity.

In conclusion, Effort is essential for every task for children to achieve goal while wrong guid

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, which significantly impacts the development of ideas. While the essay attempts to address both advantages and disadvantages, the arguments are underdeveloped and lack sufficient depth. For instance, the point about 'swimming' is confusing and does not clearly link to the prompt's theme of children's potential. Furthermore, the conclusion is incomplete, cutting off mid-sentence. Because the response is 78 words short and lacks a clear, sustained position, it does not fully address all parts of the task. To improve, you must expand your arguments with specific examples and ensure the essay is of the required length.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the progression of ideas is often unclear. While some cohesive devices are used, such as 'First and foremost' and 'On the other hand', they are sometimes used mechanically or incorrectly. The connection between sentences is frequently weak, making it difficult for the reader to follow the logic. For example, the transition from the swimming analogy to 'ethics' is abrupt and lacks coherence. Additionally, the incomplete final paragraph disrupts the overall structure. To improve, focus on using linking words more naturally and ensuring each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that supports your main argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary range is limited and often imprecise. There are several instances of awkward word choices and incorrect collocations, such as 'practice make the teenager a perfect' (should be 'practice makes perfect') and 'upgrade skill swimming'. The use of 'minor' to refer to children is also slightly unnatural in this context. While the meaning is generally conveyed, the lack of variety and the frequent errors in word formation hinder the sophistication of the writing. To improve, try to learn words in context and focus on common collocations rather than individual words.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. There are issues with subject-verb agreement ('practice make', 'This may be leads'), article usage, and sentence structure. Many sentences are simple or contain errors in complex construction, such as 'This is because most of the digital platform.' Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with the use of semicolons and commas. The incomplete sentence at the end further highlights a lack of control over sentence structure. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence patterns and proofreading for common errors like subject-verb agreement and verb tense consistency.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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