Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-08-17
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?
Student answer (Band 5.0)
In certain cultures, children are taught that they can achieve anything in this world if they work hard for it. This belief contains both advantages and disadvantages.
The main advantage of persuading children that they can achieve anything in this world if they try hard enough is that it builds confidence and motivation. By encouraging children to work hard and believe in themselves to achieve their goals, parents and teachers can build their confidence, and children may feel more motivated because they know that someone has faith in them. For instance, when a kid in school looks at his bad marks and then start feeling
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The response is significantly under-length at only 105 words, failing to meet the 250-word minimum requirement. Consequently, the task is only partially addressed. While the introduction and the first body paragraph attempt to discuss the advantages, the essay stops abruptly mid-sentence, leaving the disadvantages entirely unaddressed. This lack of development and failure to complete the task requirements severely limits the score. To improve, you must ensure you provide a balanced discussion covering both advantages and disadvantages and meet the minimum word count to allow for full development of your ideas.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The response is too short to demonstrate a full range of cohesive devices or effective paragraphing. While the initial logical flow is clear, the abrupt ending prevents any assessment of overall progression or the use of linking words to connect contrasting ideas. The paragraphing is currently insufficient due to the incomplete nature of the text. To improve, focus on structuring your essay with a clear introduction, distinct body paragraphs for advantages and disadvantages, and a conclusion, using transition signals like 'however' or 'on the other hand' to guide the reader.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is adequate for the limited content provided, but it lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. Phrases like 'achieve anything in this world' and 'work hard' are repetitive and somewhat simplistic. There is no attempt to use less common or academic vocabulary. To improve, try to incorporate more precise synonyms and collocations related to the topic of child development and success, such as 'resilience', 'self-efficacy', or 'unrealistic expectations'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The grammar is generally accurate in the sentences provided, such as 'The main advantage of persuading children... is that it builds confidence'. However, the range of structures is limited to simple and basic complex sentences. There is a grammatical error in the final sentence: 'when a kid in school looks at his bad marks and then start feeling', where 'start' should be 'starts' to agree with the subject. To improve, aim to use a wider variety of complex sentence structures, such as passive voice or conditional clauses, while maintaining accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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