Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-08-17
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?
Student answer (Band 5.0)
In few cultures , people hold the view that and taught children they can achieve anything if they work hard .
This essay will examine both the advantage and disadvantage before reaching a balance conclusion.
Firstly, the children can achieve anything with hard work it has advantages such as they remained determined towards their goals and perform well in life with confidence of their hard work. The children who putt efforts towards their goal remained consistent even if they face failure they never loose hope always ready to work more hard and they have self confidence that they can do anything . For example, CA student always try hard enough to pass the test with consistency they proved their self and they have no fair of failure .
The disadvantages are as follow The elder should not taught to children that trying hard is only enough . The goals should be achieve able and luck plays an important role to get better opportunities . The goal should be real that u want to become a photographer u should know that it is possible in your country or not and after a lot of hard tries it is not written in fortune u can not compete with your goal. For example , some students are giving their best to get jobs preparing for interview but some of them crack with only one attempt other than this a person should study medicine to become a doctor a clear knowledge towards their desires .
To concluded that, hard work and luck both plays and equal role to achieve any thing. besides that , consistency is the only way to get success never give up on your goals
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The essay addresses both the advantages and disadvantages of the prompt. However, the development of ideas is inconsistent. While the first body paragraph attempts to explain the benefits of determination, the second paragraph regarding disadvantages is somewhat confusing, particularly the argument about 'luck' and 'fortune'. The position is clear, but the supporting examples, such as the reference to 'CA students' or the specific advice about photography, are not fully developed or clearly linked to the core argument. To improve, ensure that each point is explained with logical progression rather than fragmented thoughts.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the flow between and within sentences is often disjointed. Cohesive devices are used, but they are frequently inaccurate or misused, such as 'To concluded that' and 'The disadvantages are as follow'. The lack of proper punctuation and the run-on nature of several sentences make it difficult for the reader to follow the logical progression of ideas. Paragraphing is present, but the internal structure of the paragraphs lacks the necessary transition words to create a smooth, coherent argument.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and often repetitive. There are several instances of word-choice errors and awkward collocations, such as 'balance conclusion' instead of 'balanced conclusion', 'putt efforts' instead of 'put effort', and 'no fair of failure' instead of 'no fear of failure'. The range of vocabulary is sufficient to convey basic meaning, but it lacks the precision and flexibility required for higher bands. The student relies on simple, everyday language and struggles to use more academic or topic-specific terminology effectively.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. Issues include subject-verb agreement ('luck both plays'), incorrect verb tenses, and missing articles. Sentence structures are mostly simple or contain errors when attempting complexity. For example, 'The elder should not taught to children' is grammatically incorrect. Punctuation is also problematic, with many sentences lacking proper terminal marks or using them incorrectly. While the meaning is generally discernible, the high frequency of errors in basic sentence construction limits the score in this criterion.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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