Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-08-22
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?
Student answer (Band 4.0)
Nowadays the average weight of people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing has become an increasingly common issue. this associated with disease and isolation problem and suggest some possible solution such as outdoor activies and gym are the more beneficials.
One major problem is disease it can lead to rise health problem. this is because disease can put on pressure on human body and create stress. For example, when people being feel health problem they do not want to do something and allways take rest which cen help to rise people weight. they consume more and more madicine that can create issues for the future. Another significant problem is that isolation because lonliness has been created lees mental well-bing. a good example is that people often want to talk with some one or One effective solution would be to encourage outdoor activitieswith some that make them more chearful unfortunetly that never happend so that people feel strees. Therefore this issues are rising weight of people.
One effective solution would be to encourage outdoor activities that can control weight of people. This could be achieved by providing good life style. For instance, play sports can aviod disease and provide physical perfectness. In addition they gives them freshness that will keep better do work and aviod extra weight. Another possible solution is to gym that is beneficial for human body. consequently, gym provide few healthy food that mostly important to improve health. As a result, regular exarcise keep freshmind and increasing working as well as studyability. therefore these solution may help them to reduce health problems and controls increasing weight.
In conclusion, although disease and issulation can serious issues to increasing weight. However, this issues can be addressed by some possiblem solution such as outdoor activities and gym
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 2.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 2.0
The response is completely off-topic. The prompt asks about the advantages and disadvantages of telling children they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. However, the essay discusses the causes and solutions for obesity and poor health. Because the response fails to address the task question entirely, it cannot be assessed for task achievement in relation to the prompt provided. In an actual examination, this would be treated as a memorised or irrelevant response, resulting in a very low score for Task Response.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the logical progression is weak. While there are attempts at cohesive devices such as 'One major problem', 'Another significant problem', and 'In conclusion', the connections between sentences are often illogical due to the lack of relevant content. The referencing is sometimes unclear, and the flow of ideas is disjointed, making it difficult for the reader to follow the argument. Paragraphing is present but does not effectively support the development of a coherent response.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and repetitive. There are frequent errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'physical perfectness', 'studyability', and 'allways take rest'. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to express complex ideas, and the misuse of terms often impedes clarity. The student relies on basic, everyday language and struggles to use more precise or academic terminology appropriate for an IELTS Task 2 essay.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that often cause difficulty for the reader. There are significant issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'they gives them'), sentence structure (e.g., 'this associated with disease'), and punctuation. The use of complex structures is attempted but is almost always faulty, leading to fragmented or run-on sentences. Basic errors in spelling and word form are pervasive throughout the text, indicating a lack of control over fundamental grammatical rules.
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