Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-08-23
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The current message express, In some particular cultures often say that children can achive anything with consistent hard work and that can result to success.I strongly believes this, Because it can create a developing mindset to achive anything.
The key advantage of teaching them about hard work and never giving up, can lead to increase the confidence of children from their childhood itself. This often make them stronge to face anything in the route of success by trying hard enough. For example in some culture of Marvadis, They develop a mindset and marketing stratage to children while they are in childhood, After they grow up to deal with father's the business of fatperfect hard work.
Tranining from childhood can make a children to achieve anything due to the positive behavior and never give up mind they got tranined with childhood.
They also had some drowbacks same culture because will forgot the actual talent they capable of. While in some case children can feel pressure about each words often told by them, which can also lead to mental stress, not having enjoyment in childhood, behavior issues, miscommunication and misunderstanding. For an example, In Lambadi culture children to forced to work in field and make them to addicit by not having a proper education, They also make their own deicision not about children future. Even sometimes, Children can't able to achive anything due to wrong guidelines from culture people because of lack in education, living enviornment, half knowledge about something which can make children mind confused at early stages.
This can be conclude, That even with propar guiding and pampering to children can also lead negative though process. So culture should the reach right people and understanding studert ability about town talent and then they need to support for achieving anything by hard efforts.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses both the advantages and disadvantages of the prompt. However, the development of ideas is inconsistent. While you mention the benefits of a growth mindset and the drawbacks of excessive pressure, the examples provided (Marvadis and Lambadi cultures) are somewhat unclear and lack sufficient explanation to fully support your arguments. The position is generally clear, but the conclusion is slightly repetitive and does not fully synthesize the points made. To improve, ensure that each body paragraph focuses on a single, well-explained idea with a clear link back to the prompt.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the logical progression between sentences is often disrupted by grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'The key advantage' and 'This can be conclude', but they are sometimes used incorrectly or mechanically. The referencing is occasionally unclear, making it difficult for the reader to follow the flow of your argument. Improving the use of transition words and ensuring that each sentence logically follows the previous one will significantly enhance the coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and often repetitive. There are frequent errors in word choice and spelling, such as 'achive' instead of 'achieve', 'stratage' for 'strategy', and 'drowbacks' for 'drawbacks'. While you attempt to use topic-specific vocabulary, the inaccuracies sometimes impede the clarity of your message. To reach a higher band, focus on using a wider range of vocabulary and ensure that you are using words in their correct context. Proofreading for common spelling errors will also help improve your score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains a high frequency of grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues (e.g., 'children to forced', 'culture should the reach'), incorrect verb forms, and sentence fragments. While there is an attempt to use complex structures, these are often faulty, which can make the meaning unclear. The punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma usage. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence structures before attempting more complex ones, and pay close attention to verb tenses and pluralization.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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