Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-08-23

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In recent years, self-confidence has become increasingly important in many parts of the world. Although this development may give rise to certain drawbacks, I believe that its advantages outweigh its disadvantages, particularly in terms of choosing the right career and developing a strong work ethic.

The most significant advantage of self-confidence is that it can help people make good career choices. This is primarily because confident children are more willing to explore different career opportunities and challenge themselves. As a result, they may become doctors, engineers, or pursue other professional careers. A clear example of this can be seen in educated families, where children are encouraged to be confident and believe that they can succeed if they work hard. Therefore, this aspect of self-confidence can have a particularly positive impact on students.

Another important benefit is that self-confidence can encourage hard work. One reason for this is that people who believe in themselves are more likely to put effort into achieving their goals. This applies not only to education but also to practical life. This means that if people have confidence in their abilities and work hard, they can achieve many of their goals. For instance, if someone works hard to become a successful businessman, their confidence can motivate them to overcome difficulties and continue working towards their ambition. Consequently, self-confidence can contribute considerably to developing discipline and perseverance, further strengthening the case for this positive development.

In conclusion, while self-confidence may have some drawbacks, I believe that these are outweighed by its benefits. In particular, its impact on choosing the right career and encouraging hard work makes it a worthwhile development overall.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt by discussing the advantages of the 'anything is possible' message, but it fails to adequately address the disadvantages. While the introduction mentions that there may be 'certain drawbacks', the body paragraphs focus exclusively on the benefits. The prompt explicitly asks for both advantages and disadvantages, so the lack of a balanced discussion limits the development of the response. To reach a higher band, you must provide at least one clear disadvantage, such as the potential for disappointment or a lack of realism when children face inevitable failures. The position is clear, but the task response is incomplete due to the missing analysis of the negative side.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph has a central theme, and the progression of ideas is easy to follow. You use cohesive devices such as 'As a result', 'Therefore', and 'For instance' effectively to link sentences. However, the transitions between paragraphs are somewhat mechanical. To improve, try to vary your cohesive devices and ensure that the relationship between the 'drawbacks' mentioned in the introduction and the lack of discussion in the body is better managed, perhaps by briefly acknowledging a disadvantage before refuting it or balancing it with the advantages.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary to convey your ideas clearly. Phrases like 'work ethic', 'professional careers', and 'discipline and perseverance' are used appropriately. However, the vocabulary is somewhat repetitive, particularly the frequent use of 'self-confidence' and 'hard work'. To achieve a higher band, you should incorporate more sophisticated synonyms and collocations. For example, instead of repeating 'hard work', you could use 'diligent effort', 'tenacity', or 'a strong sense of application'. The current range is adequate for the task but lacks the flexibility and precision required for higher bands.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5

The essay displays a good mix of simple and complex sentence structures. Most sentences are error-free, and your control of punctuation is generally sound. You successfully use conditional structures ('if people have confidence... they can achieve') and relative clauses. There are no major grammatical errors that impede communication. To move into the 8.0 range, you should aim for a wider variety of complex structures, such as inversion or more sophisticated passive constructions, and ensure that your sentence variety is consistently maintained throughout the text.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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