Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-08-24

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In many cultures, kids are constantly told that they can achieve absolutely anything if they just work hard enough. While this kind of encouragement is great building confidence and grit, it can also backfire and also cause a lot of emotional stress when real world obstacles get in the way .

On the positive side, teaching kids that hard work pays off has some amazing benefits. It helps them build what expects call a " growth mindset". Instead of giving up the moments when things get tough, they learn to view mistakes a just a part of the learning process. This makes them resilient and disciplined, which are traits that helps them succeed later in life. Plus, when you tell a child that the sky is the limit, it gives them the courage to dream bid. It inspires kids from everyday backgrounds to reach for ambitious goals , like becoming a doctor or an artist, that they might have otherwise though were impossible.

However, there is a dark side to this message because it ignores hoe the real world actually works. The truth is , success is not just about trying hard; it also depends on things people can not control, like family wealth, luck, and natural talent .

At the end telling kids that effort guarantees success is a great way to boost their ambitions, but it need to be grounded in reality . We should praise the efforts of the children and need to teach them to work hard and to handle struggles in life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both the advantages and disadvantages of the prompt. You have a clear position and provide relevant supporting ideas, such as the 'growth mindset' for advantages and the 'real world' limitations for disadvantages. However, the development is somewhat brief. To reach a higher band, you could expand on the consequences of these messages with more specific examples or deeper analysis. For instance, you mention 'emotional stress' in the introduction but do not fully explore how this manifests in the body paragraphs. Overall, the task is well-addressed, but the depth of argument could be more consistent.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized with clear paragraphing. You use cohesive devices such as 'On the positive side', 'Instead of', and 'However' to transition between ideas. While the flow is generally smooth, some of the linking is slightly mechanical. For example, the transition between the introduction and the first body paragraph could be more sophisticated. Additionally, ensure that referencing is precise; in the final paragraph, 'At the end' is slightly unnatural and would be better phrased as 'In conclusion' or 'Ultimately'. Overall, the progression of ideas is clear and easy to follow.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'resilient', 'disciplined', and 'growth mindset' effectively. However, there are several minor errors in word choice and spelling, such as 'expects' instead of 'experts', 'bid' instead of 'big', and 'hoe' instead of 'how'. These errors do not impede communication, but they do prevent the response from reaching a higher band. To improve, focus on proofreading for these small slips and try to incorporate more precise, academic collocations to elevate the tone of your writing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, such as 'Instead of giving up the moments when things get tough, they learn to view mistakes as just a part of the learning process.' There are some grammatical slips, such as 'traits that helps' (should be 'help') and 'it need to be' (should be 'it needs to be'). Punctuation is generally functional, though there are occasional spacing issues before periods. The errors are non-systematic and do not cause difficulty for the reader, but more consistent control over subject-verb agreement would improve the accuracy of your writing.

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