Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-08-25

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In this current phenomenon, it is often argued that in a range of cultures, parents are teaching their child from a very small age that if they want to get or achieve something they should try hard enough to get that. I considerably believed that this opinion has far more advantages which will be streamlined in the subsequent paragraphs.

Supporter of advantages believe that it will build confidence in children To detail it out, If student learn that they have to do very hard-work to get a success from a small age so they will have guts to face any challenges and try to achieve that. Moreover, confident before exams or a competitions is very necessary to get a success.

Secondly, it will encourage children hard work and determination. They will learn that success comes through efforts. To elaborate this, child become discipline and it will put all their efforts even after facing some failures. The combination of hard work and determination encourage them to be a very successful person in the future life. For instance, Athlete and students improves after regular practice without efforts they can achieve nothing and they will truly know what the efforts is

Lastly, one more benefits is helps achieving goal. Children will become goal-oriented and a growth mindset motivates them each day to follow their success path. To explain it further, Some goals depend on talent, opportunity or physical ability, not only hard work and Instead of fearing failure, they continue learning and developing. For instant, if a child want to become a professional football player so he has to practice regularly and has to learn a new skill each day and has to improve performance from their teenage and he will become definitely a best player like The famous football player in the world, whose name is Cristiano Ronaldo.

Conclusively, in my opinion this notion has only benefits such as it gain confidence, encourage hard work and determination and makes goal oriented children from a small age.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses the prompt by discussing the advantages of the 'growth mindset' message, but it fails to address the 'disadvantages' part of the question entirely. The prompt explicitly asks for both advantages and disadvantages, and by focusing only on the benefits, the response is incomplete. While the ideas provided (confidence, determination, goal-orientation) are relevant, they are not balanced. To reach a higher band, you must provide a counter-argument or discuss potential downsides, such as the risk of burnout or the frustration caused when hard work does not lead to success due to external factors.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. For example, 'To detail it out' and 'For instant' are non-standard transitions. The progression of ideas within paragraphs is sometimes disjointed, particularly in the third paragraph where the argument shifts from 'hard work' to 'talent and opportunity' without a clear logical bridge. While the paragraphing is sufficient, the internal cohesion needs more sophisticated linking words and better logical flow between sentences.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and variety required for higher bands. There are several instances of awkward phrasing and incorrect word forms, such as 'supporter of advantages' instead of 'proponents of this view' and 'child become discipline' instead of 'children become disciplined'. The range is somewhat limited, and there is a reliance on basic descriptors. To improve, you should focus on learning collocations and ensuring that word forms (nouns vs. adjectives) are used correctly in context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Common issues include subject-verb agreement ('child become discipline'), article usage ('a success', 'a best player'), and sentence fragments or run-on sentences. While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of errors in basic grammar prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. You should focus on proofreading for subject-verb agreement and ensuring that plural/singular nouns are used correctly.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.