Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-08-26

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Nowadays, children are told that they can achieve anything with hard work. This has both advantages and disadvantages. In this essay I will discuss both the sides.

Firstly, telling a child that he can achieve anything cause a positive attitude to develop in his his personality. He starts to do hard work in his studies to get desired grades. This helps him to standout in his class and in his friend group. Such people often lead a team they have the spirit to encourage others.

Another advantage is that they become self dependent and work hard for all of their dreams. With this attitude their hard work becomes more reasonable. For example, if a child has the dream to become a famous person he won't be waiting for any chance. But instead, he will work hard all by himself.

Secondly, it also have some disadvantages like if a child is chasing his dream for years but unfortunately he fails he will start blaming himself for not working hard enough. Such thing causes low self-esteem in the youngsters and can lead to stress and depression. As he cannot balance his life.

Another disadvantage is that they work so much that they forget about their physical health. Their expectations increase and efforts too. Like a student who is trying to get good grades does not sleeps well and studies day and night with bad nutrition. These things causes a illness during exams time which can lead to major problems. That's why children should reconsider their goals and work for a dream which is possible instead of running behind blind dreams.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The essay addresses both the advantages and disadvantages of the prompt. The ideas are relevant, such as the development of a positive attitude versus the risk of low self-esteem. However, the development is somewhat superficial. For instance, the point about 'physical health' is introduced but lacks a deeper exploration of the psychological impact of such pressure. The position is clear throughout, but the arguments could be extended with more nuanced examples to reach a higher band. The conclusion provides a brief summary but does not fully synthesize the arguments presented.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, each focusing on a specific aspect of the prompt. There is a logical progression from the advantages to the disadvantages. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and repetitive (e.g., 'Firstly', 'Another advantage', 'Secondly', 'Another disadvantage'). Some transitions between sentences are abrupt, and the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the phrase 'Such thing causes low self-esteem', where 'Such thing' is a vague reference to the previous sentence. Improved use of linking words would enhance the flow.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks variety and precision. There is a reliance on basic terms like 'hard work', 'good grades', and 'famous person'. While the meaning is clear, the range is limited, and there are some awkward collocations, such as 'running behind blind dreams' and 'causes a illness'. To improve, you should aim to incorporate more sophisticated vocabulary related to psychology, ambition, and personal development to demonstrate a wider range of lexical control.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally distract the reader. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('it also have', 'these things causes'), article misuse ('a illness'), and punctuation errors. While these errors do not impede overall communication, they are persistent throughout the text. To reach a higher band, you need to focus on subject-verb agreement, consistent verb tense usage, and more accurate control over complex sentence structures.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.