Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-08-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 6.5)

In many communities, children are advised that they can succeed anything they want if they work hard. While it increases their motivation and determination about their goals, it can sometimes set unrealistic expectations and cause significant disappointment when they fail.

On the one hand, encouraging children to work hard in order to achieve anything make them determined and ambitious. They learn from a very early age that nothing is free unless they work hard towards their goals. As a result, such children potentially have more perseverance, confidence and do not give up easily. This attitude increases their possibility to become successful in the future to a great extent. For example, a child who performed weak in mathematics might get higher score in the next exam if he practices more.

On the other hand, such advises are sometimes associated with unrealistic goal settings and disappointments after failing recurrently even after trying extremely hard. Gradually, it might drain them mentally which can hamper cognitive development. Success is not entirely linked to working hard only, its connected to various external factors such as, financial backup, equal opportunities, academic results, economic or political stability and sometimes luck. If children are not acknowledged about these external factors, they would blame themselves for not being able to achieve something. For instance, not everyone is going be a great athlete or a famous actor even after trying hard and that is the reality. Therefore, it is important to teach them about the practicality about the circumstances as well.

In conclusion, telling children that they can achieve anything by hard work is undoubtedly true as it makes them more confident, focused and determined towards their goals. However, its also important to inform about the additional factors that are crucial in achieving goals, otherwise they might set ambitious goals and become frustrated after trying hard and consider themselves useless.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, providing a clear position and discussing both advantages and disadvantages. The ideas are relevant and generally well-developed. For example, the argument regarding the psychological impact of unrealistic expectations is well-supported by the mention of external factors like 'financial backup' and 'political stability'. The essay maintains a consistent position throughout. To reach a higher band, the student could further extend the examples, perhaps by contrasting the 'hard work' philosophy with the reality of systemic barriers more deeply, ensuring the balance between the two sides of the argument remains precise.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', 'As a result', and 'Therefore' are used effectively to guide the reader. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the advantages from the disadvantages. While the flow is generally smooth, some transitions could be more sophisticated to improve the overall cohesion. The referencing is clear, and the progression of ideas from the benefits of motivation to the potential for frustration is logical and easy to follow.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is sufficient for the task and allows for some flexibility. The student uses relevant terms such as 'perseverance', 'cognitive development', and 'external factors'. However, there are some minor inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'succeed anything they want' (should be 'succeed in anything') and 'such advises' (advice is an uncountable noun). While the range is adequate to convey complex ideas, more precise or idiomatic collocations would elevate the score. The errors do not impede communication, but they highlight a need for more attention to word forms and usage.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There is a good attempt at using complex sentences, such as 'While it increases their motivation... it can sometimes set unrealistic expectations'. However, there are recurring grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues like 'encouraging children... make them' (should be 'makes') and 'its connected' (should be 'it is' or 'it's'). Punctuation is generally correct, but the occasional misuse of articles and pluralization persists. The errors rarely impede communication, but they prevent the essay from reaching the higher bands where error-free complex structures are more frequent.

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