Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-08-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 6.0)

These days children lack motivation to achieve their goals, and they don't have a strong ambition in life. Consistency and being disciplined are the two major factors for success and to make progress as well. Moreover, encouraging yourself is also a vital prospect for determination. I strongly agree that if u dedicate yourself, you can achieve anything in life.

In this essay, I will discuss about the disadvantages and advantages of doing hard work.

First of all, achieving your goals requires sacrifices and loneliness is the price you pay to get what you want and what you want to be in life. It takes pressure, risk and it causes everything to get what you need in life. The life offers stress and too much pressure can also cause health problems too. The point is if you can't handle it, don't make a burden for yourself. Sometimes it takes time to achieve something and most of the people compare themselves to others which is also wrong. As being a Muslim " Quran also states that Allah puts certain amount of pressure on their servants from which they can deal with it" meaning that destiny is written, so need to take tension of the future. Speaking about me I have seen myself in these situations so i know how to deal with it.

There are also some advantages as well. If you do hard work and perform well in small situations and can handle stuff, then obviously you will also grow and in other words get matured, you can also handle obligations and can also take part in future purposes. Now to the point when you achieve something, you look forward in life, and this is how you win in life. Furthermore, when you push yourself, you seek opportunities where others don't look for it. Sometimes failure is also vital for different phases of life as well because you will try again and again and will never give up which will put you in a position like an Idol etc. for others. for example, nowadays the world is looking at Elon Musk. What he will do in future and the moments he is having would also be someone else dreams. He keeps pushing himself to just put a flag on a moon, what motivates him is that he never gives up and he would be the first to do so.

Hence, whatever you do in life "just do it, do it now" which is the most important thing. Gandhi also said that "our actions have no value but do it because that's the last thing you will regret." So Dear Children around the world hope for the best and be brave and without thinking achieve your goals and enjoy every moment of your lives...

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both the advantages and disadvantages of the prompt. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. The discussion on disadvantages is a bit disjointed, moving from the pressure of success to religious perspectives and personal anecdotes, which weakens the focus. The advantages section is better developed, using the example of Elon Musk to illustrate the benefits of persistence. While the position is clear, the essay occasionally drifts into personal advice rather than maintaining an objective academic tone. To reach a higher band, ensure that each point is directly linked to the prompt and supported by clear, logical reasoning rather than anecdotal evidence.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into paragraphs, and there is a clear attempt to use cohesive devices such as 'Moreover', 'First of all', and 'Furthermore'. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical or abrupt. For example, the transition into the religious quote is sudden and lacks a smooth connection to the preceding argument about stress. Additionally, some referencing is unclear, such as the use of 'it' in 'from which they can deal with it'. While the overall progression is logical, the use of cohesive devices is not always flexible or natural, which limits the score to a 6.0.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and sophistication required for higher bands. There is some repetition of basic terms like 'life', 'achieve', and 'success'. While there are attempts to use less common vocabulary (e.g., 'obligations', 'determination'), these are sometimes used in slightly unnatural collocations, such as 'vital prospect for determination' or 'take tension of the future'. Spelling is generally accurate, but the range of vocabulary is limited to common, everyday language rather than academic or topic-specific terminology.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay displays a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors throughout, such as 'the life offers stress', 'most of the people compare themselves', and 'take tension of the future'. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with the use of quotation marks and informal contractions like 'u'. While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding the message, they occur frequently enough to impact the overall fluency and accuracy of the writing. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles.

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