Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-08-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 6.0)

These days children lack motivation to achieve their goals, and they don't have a strong ambition in life. Consistency and being disciplined are the two major factors for success and to make progress as well. Moreover, encouraging yourself is also a vital prospect for determination. I strongly agree that if u dedicate yourself, you can achieve anything in life. In this essay, I will discuss about the pros and cons of doing hard work.

First of all, achieving your goals requires sacrifices and loneliness is the price you pay to get what you want and what you want to be in life. It takes pressure, risk and it causes everything to get what you need in life. The life offers stress and too much pressure can also cause health problems too. The point is if you can't handle it, don't make a burden for yourself. Sometimes it takes time to achieve something and most of the people compare themselves to others which is also wrong. As being a Muslim " Quran also states that Allah puts certain amount of pressure on their servants from which they can deal with it" meaning that destiny is written, so need to take tension of the future. Speaking about me I have seen myself in these situations so i know how to deal with it.

There are also some advantages as well. If you do hard work and perform well in small situations and can handle stuff, then obviously you will also grow and in other words get matured, you can also handle obligations and can also take part in future purposes. Now to the point when you achieve something, you look forward in life, and this is how you win in life. Furthermore, when you push yourself, you seek opportunities where others don't look for it. Sometimes failure is also vital for different phases of life as well because you will try again and again and will never give up which will put you in a position like an Idol etc. for others. for example, nowadays the world is looking at Elon Musk. What he will do in future and the moments he is having would also be someone else dreams. He keeps pushing himself to just put a flag on a moon, what motivates him is that he never gives up and he would be the first to do so.

Hence, whatever you do in life "just do it, do it now" which is the most important thing. Gandhi also said that "our actions have no value but do it because that's the last thing you will regret." So Dear Children around the world hope for the best and be brave and without thinking achieve your goals and enjoy every moment of your lives.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt by discussing both advantages and disadvantages. However, the development is inconsistent. The discussion of disadvantages is somewhat vague, focusing on 'stress' and 'loneliness' without clearly linking these to the specific message of 'achieving anything if you try hard enough.' The inclusion of personal anecdotes and religious references is slightly off-topic and detracts from the academic tone required for Task 2. While the position is clear, the arguments lack the depth and logical progression expected at higher bands. The conclusion is more of a motivational speech than a summary of the essay's points.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the logical flow is often disrupted by abrupt transitions and informal phrasing. While some cohesive devices are used (e.g., 'Moreover', 'First of all', 'Furthermore'), they are sometimes used mechanically or inappropriately. The referencing is occasionally unclear, particularly in the second paragraph where the transition between the concept of hard work and the religious reference feels disjointed. Paragraphing is present, but the internal structure of the paragraphs lacks a clear, cohesive argument, making the progression of ideas feel somewhat erratic rather than smooth.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and range required for a higher band. There is a reliance on common, informal phrasing such as 'handle stuff', 'take tension', and 'win in life'. While there are attempts at more sophisticated vocabulary (e.g., 'obligations', 'determination'), these are often used in contexts that feel slightly unnatural. There are also minor errors in word choice, such as 'vital prospect' instead of 'vital aspect'. The range is sufficient to convey meaning, but it does not demonstrate the flexibility or control needed for a higher score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but the accuracy is inconsistent. There are frequent grammatical errors, such as 'the life offers stress', 'most of the people', and 'no need to take tension'. Punctuation is also problematic, particularly with the misuse of quotation marks and the lack of proper sentence boundaries in some areas. While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors, combined with the informal tone, prevents the writing from reaching a higher band. A greater focus on subject-verb agreement and article usage is needed.

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