Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-09-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Achieving any thing in life is not compulsory but achieving our aims is compulsory. We should work hard to achieve our aims in life. I think advising our children to work hard to get their aims is a very good thing.

Primarily, in some cultures, children are told that they achieve anything if they try hard enough. I think this is an advantage because those children who don,t know what to do in life, should have a way to do something. They do effort instead of doing nothing. They want to try not to sit empty hand. They can try and become enough to face the hard reality of life. They set their aim and do effort to achieve it, after achieving one aim in life, their build a sense of responsibility and they became able to do anything more in their life. By giving children this message, they do only meaning full works instead of those work which has no taste himself. So the more they try more they achieve.

Furthermore, this may be a disadvantage, because some students are not able to do anything so they feel ugly to to anything. The don,t achieve any aim because when they listen about hard work they get bored and don,t want to do anything.

To conclude, firs of all we should built sense of responsibility and then guide their children to do hard work. I think it is a great deal to to anythinso its all

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses the prompt by discussing both advantages and disadvantages. However, the development of ideas is limited and often repetitive. The argument regarding disadvantages is particularly underdeveloped, as the reasoning that children 'feel ugly to do anything' is unclear and lacks logical support. Furthermore, the essay fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, which negatively impacts the overall task completion. To improve, you should provide more specific examples and ensure that each point is fully explained with clear logical links to the prompt.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the progression of ideas is often disjointed. While some cohesive devices like 'Primarily' and 'Furthermore' are used, they are sometimes applied mechanically or inappropriately. The concluding paragraph is incomplete and lacks a clear summary of the main points, which disrupts the overall flow of the argument. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that connects back to the main argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is basic and repetitive. Phrases such as 'do effort' (instead of 'make an effort') and 'meaning full works' (instead of 'meaningful tasks') indicate a limited range and issues with collocation. There are also instances of word-choice errors, such as 'feel ugly to do anything,' which obscure the intended meaning. To reach a higher band, you should work on using more precise academic vocabulary and collocations, and avoid repeating the same simple verbs throughout the text.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay relies heavily on simple sentence structures. There are frequent grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues ('they became able'), punctuation errors (missing apostrophes in 'don,t'), and awkward phrasing. While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of errors in basic grammar and sentence construction hinders the clarity of the writing. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence structures, subject-verb agreement, and correct punctuation before attempting more complex grammatical forms.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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