Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-09-05
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Children are like a clay. We can mold them in any shape in their early age. in some cultures, people start forcing the kids to focus on theit goals and achieve them by teaching them that hard work is key to success. This opinion has both pros and cons. I will discuss both in further paragraphs.
Firstly, I will discuss its benifits, If the kids are to be told in their early age that they can get success in any sector or feild, they will become more focused in their life. For example if a kid will join a sports and he will be told by his couch that he will be perfect in that sport one day, the kid will start practicing that daily and do hard work and when will achieve the goal. As a result, it will built confident in that kid and it will teach a life3 lesson to him. Similary, this motivation helps the kids in their academic sector. Consicuently, kids grown like this, never loose their dedication in their whole life any any sector.
On the other hand, this attitude towards kids can also has negative effect of children because sometimes kids take pressure on their mind in their young age and they get depressed if they fail in their task achievement. For instance, any kids commit suicide when they are pressurised by their parents to get the highest score in their exams and they fail.
In conlusion, although It is good to teach lessons to the kids in their early age and make them focus on t
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The essay addresses both the advantages and disadvantages of the prompt, but the development is uneven. While the benefits are supported with a relevant example regarding sports, the discussion of disadvantages is somewhat brief and relies on a very extreme example (suicide) without sufficient nuance. Furthermore, the essay is incomplete; it ends abruptly in the middle of a sentence in the conclusion, which means the position is not fully developed or clearly restated. This lack of a proper conclusion significantly impacts the overall task response, as the argument remains unfinished.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay uses basic cohesive devices such as 'Firstly', 'On the other hand', and 'In conclusion' to signal the structure. However, the progression of ideas is hindered by the incomplete ending. Paragraphing is present, but the logical flow within paragraphs is sometimes disrupted by awkward phrasing and grammatical errors. Referencing is generally clear, but the mechanical nature of the transitions prevents a higher score. The abrupt termination of the text makes it difficult to assess the overall coherence of the final argument.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary range is adequate for the task but lacks precision and sophistication. There are several spelling errors, such as 'benifits' instead of 'benefits', 'feild' for 'field', 'couch' for 'coach', and 'Consicuently' for 'Consequently'. These errors are frequent enough to be noticeable. The student relies on simple, repetitive language and struggles with accurate collocations, such as 'take pressure on their mind'. To improve, the student should focus on learning more academic vocabulary and proofreading for common spelling mistakes.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but accuracy is inconsistent. There are frequent errors in subject-verb agreement ('this attitude... can also has'), article usage ('a sports'), and word forms ('it will built confident'). Punctuation is also problematic, with several run-on sentences and comma splices. While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of grammatical slips prevents the reader from focusing entirely on the content. More attention to basic sentence construction and proofreading for grammatical consistency is required.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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