Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-09-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In many cultures, people tell their children that they can achieve success if they put in the required effort. The advantages of this approach are that the children will become disciplined and would become a successful person. On the other hand, the disadvantages include hopelessness in certain scenerios and not working smart.

The primary benefit is that children will always try to work hard and stay consistent. No matter how difficult the situation gets they will never give up. For instance, many athletes share one common experience which was to not give up and they learnt that from their parents. Another advantage is that when a person knows that everything is achievable they never make excuses. They will never hesitate to choose a task based on its difficulty rather its benefits. Many professional fighters always say that they fight because they love the sport.

In many situations the outcome is beyond the control of a person. For example, an esports athlete failed in a tournament because of his team. In such situations hard work does not always bring positive results. Hence, children should be taught to deal with failures as well. Similarly, a lot of tasks require smart work instead of working day and night on them. Some tasks may require using a technique which is simple to solve it instead of working really hard. In order to solve a problem, a professional should look for methods already developed instead of building them from scratch.

Putting efforts in doing a task doesnot always bring success. It can make a person consistent and successful. However, in certain scenerios such a lesson can cause children to lose heart. Apart from this, many situations demand a person to use their brain instead of blind effort.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both the advantages and disadvantages of the prompt. The ideas are relevant, such as the development of discipline and the potential for disappointment when outcomes are beyond one's control. However, the development is somewhat uneven. While the advantages are supported by examples like athletes, the discussion on 'smart work' in the third paragraph is a bit brief and could have been more deeply explored to reach a higher band. The position is clear throughout, but the conclusion is a bit repetitive rather than synthesising the arguments effectively. Overall, it meets the requirements of the task well.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organised into clear paragraphs, each with a central theme. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'The primary benefit', 'On the other hand', and 'Similarly', which help guide the reader. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and the flow between sentences could be smoother. For instance, the transition between the example of the esports athlete and the broader point about 'smart work' is a bit abrupt. Paragraphing is used appropriately, and there is a clear progression of ideas from the introduction to the conclusion.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express their ideas clearly. There are some attempts at less common vocabulary, such as 'consistent' and 'beyond the control of a person'. However, there are some minor inaccuracies and repetitive phrasing, such as the repeated use of 'hard work' and 'successful'. The spelling error 'scenerios' occurs twice, which is a noticeable slip. To improve, the student should aim for more varied collocations and precise terminology to demonstrate a wider range of lexical control.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is always clear, there are several grammatical errors, such as 'would become a successful person' (tense inconsistency), 'rather its benefits' (missing preposition 'than'), and 'doesnot' (spelling/spacing). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are some missing commas in complex sentences. The majority of sentences are understandable, but the frequency of minor errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Increasing the variety of complex structures while ensuring accuracy would be beneficial.

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