Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-09-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In many cultures, people tell their children that they can achieve success if they put in the required effort. The advantages of this approach are that the children will become disciplined and successful. On the other hand, the disadvantages include hopelessness in certain scenarios and not preferring smartwork.

The primary benefit is that children will always try to work hard and stay consistent. No matter how difficult the situation gets they will never give up. For instance, many successful athletes share one common advice which is to not give up and they learnt it from their parents. Furthermore, another advantage is that when people know that everything is achievable they never make excuses at the time of failure. As a result, they never hesitate to choose a task based on its difficulty. Many professional fighters always say that they fight because of their love for the sport.

In many situations the outcome is beyond the control of a person. For example, an esports athlete may fail in a tournament solely because of his team. In such conditions, hard work does not always bring positive results. Hence, children should be taught to deal with failures as well. Similarly, a lot of tasks require smart work instead of working day and night on them. Some projects may require using a technique, which is already deployed instead of making a new one. In order to solve a problem, a professional should plan about the procedure of a work activity before starting to work on it.

Putting efforts in doing a task does not always bring success. It can make a person consistent and successful. However, in certain scenarios such a lesson can cause children to lose heart. Apart from this, many situations demand a person to use their brain instead of putting effort blindly.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both the advantages and disadvantages of the prompt. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. While the advantages are supported by examples like athletes, the disadvantages are less thoroughly explored. The point about 'smart work' is introduced but could be better integrated into the argument regarding the limitations of effort. The conclusion is a bit repetitive, merely restating points rather than synthesising them. To reach a higher band, ensure that each point is fully extended with clear logical links to the prompt's core question about the impact of this message on children.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organised with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the advantages and disadvantages. Cohesive devices such as 'On the other hand', 'Furthermore', and 'As a result' are used to guide the reader. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and the flow between the final paragraph and the preceding ones could be smoother. The referencing is generally clear, though the connection between the 'smart work' argument and the 'hopelessness' argument could be more tightly managed to improve the overall progression of ideas.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express ideas clearly. There is an attempt to use topic-specific vocabulary such as 'consistent', 'tournament', and 'procedure'. However, the range is somewhat limited, and there is a reliance on simpler phrasing like 'putting efforts' or 'working day and night'. To improve, the student should aim for more precise collocations and a wider variety of academic vocabulary. Some word choices, such as 'not preferring smartwork', are slightly awkward and could be phrased more naturally.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is consistently clear, there are some grammatical inaccuracies, such as 'many successful athletes share one common advice which is to not give up' (should be 'a piece of advice') and 'plan about the procedure' (should be 'plan the procedure'). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are minor errors in sentence construction. The control of grammar is sufficient for communication, but more variety in complex structures and greater precision in error-free sentences would be required for a higher band.

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