Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-09-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achive anything if they work hard enough. This message can have several benefits, but it may also create unrealistic expectations. In my opinion, encoraging children to work hard is positive, as long as they also understand that success depends on other factors.

One major advantage is that this belief can motivate children to put more effort into their studies and other activities. When children believe that hard work can improve their future, they may become more determined and responsible. For example, a student who finds mathematics difficult may continue practising instead of giving up. This can help children develop qualities such as, patience, discipline and cofidence.

However, there are also some diadvantages. hard work does not always gurantee success because people have diffrent abilities, opportunities and circumstances. If children are repetedly told that they can achieve anything. They may feel disappointment or blame themselevs when they fail despite making a great effort. This can also create unnecesary presure, especially when parent expect extremely high academic or career achievements.

In conclution, telling children that hard work can help them achieve their goals is generally beneficial because it encorages determination and a positive attitude. However, children shuold also be taught that success is influenced by ability, opportunities and sometimes luck, so they can have realistic expections.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of telling children they can achieve anything with hard work, while also presenting a clear overall position in the introduction and conclusion. Ideas are extended with relevant examples, such as a student continuing to practice mathematics despite difficulties. However, the response must be penalised for failing to meet the minimum length requirement, as it contains only 224 words rather than the required 250 words. This under-length impacts the full development of ideas, preventing the essay from achieving a higher band score despite its clear structure and relevant arguments.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear logical progression from the introduction through body paragraphs discussing advantages and disadvantages, to a concluding summary. Paragraphing is used sufficiently and appropriately, with each body paragraph focusing on a distinct theme. Cohesive devices are generally well managed, using transition words like 'One major advantage', 'However', and 'In conclution' to guide the reader through the text. Referencing is mostly clear, contributing to the overall readability of the response, although minor spelling errors in transitional phrases detract slightly from an otherwise well-organised piece.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary suitable for the task, successfully attempting less common items and phrasing such as 'unrealistic expectations', 'determination', 'circumstances', and 'influence'. However, there are several spelling errors throughout the text, including 'achive', 'encoraging', 'cofidence', 'diadvantages', 'gurantee', 'diffrent', 'repetedly', 'themselevs', 'unnecesary', and 'conclution'. While these errors do not seriously impede communication, their frequency prevents the lexical score from reaching Band 7. Word choice and collocations are generally appropriate for conveying the intended arguments about hard work and success.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The writer demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, incorporating conditional structures and relative clauses effectively, such as 'This message can have several benefits, but it may also create unrealistic expectations' and 'a student who finds mathematics difficult may continue practising instead of giving up'. There are some errors in grammar and punctuation, notably a sentence fragment ('If children are repetedly told that they can achieve anything. They may feel disappointment...') and occasional punctuation slips around list items ('qualities such as, patience, discipline and cofidence'). Nevertheless, these errors are relatively infrequent and rarely impede overall communication.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.