Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-09-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The growing prevalence of this debate regarding telling children that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough has generated considerable debate about the advantages and disadvantages. While both debates has their strong points. I firmly believe that if children are taught to work hard in order to achieve something theres a good chance that they will end up achieving it.

The advantages of teaching children to think in a certain manner are numerous. Creating a mindset that makes them work hard if they want to achieve something teaches them the reality of this world that nothing is granted, you have to earn it. If they are taught such things from a young age that will help them in leading a a good life later on. For instance, when a child is taught to finish their homework and so that they can have icecream with dinner, they put all their effort in finishing homework to have icecream.

On the contrary, the disadvantages depends on what kind of mindset they have prepared growing up, some children might end up thinking that if you work enough you can have anything in this world, while life is not fair like that and might end up hurting their morale and resulting in their demotivation towards hard work.

In conclusion, there are reasonable arguments about this debate, but I believe that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. In my opinion, teaching children to work hard provides them a positive mindset about life, because it provides them a motivation and also teaches them that nothing can be achieved freely.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of telling children they can achieve anything. A clear position is stated in the introduction and maintained throughout the essay. The advantages are supported with a relevant example regarding a child finishing homework to get ice cream. However, the development of ideas remains somewhat general and could be extended further for a higher band. For instance, the disadvantage section discusses how unrealistic expectations can lead to demotivation, but this point is expressed somewhat loosely. Overall, the ideas are relevant and adequately cover the prompt requirements, fitting well into the Band 6 descriptor.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate advantages from disadvantages. However, cohesion at the sentence level is occasionally faulty. For example, there are run-on sentences and punctuation issues, such as 'While both debates has their strong points. I firmly believe...', where a full stop incorrectly splits a dependent clause from the main clause. Referencing and cohesive devices such as 'For instance' and 'On the contrary' are used to guide the reader, but the overall flow can feel a bit mechanical due to grammatical tracking issues, placing this performance securely at Band 6.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully incorporating phrases like 'growing prevalence', 'considerable debate', 'unrealistic expectations', and 'demotivation towards hard work'. There are some attempts at less common lexical items, but they are occasionally accompanied by awkward word choices or minor inaccuracies, such as 'leading a a good life' and 'the disadvantages depends on what kind of mindset'. Spelling is generally accurate, and vocabulary errors do not impede communication, allowing the reader to follow the arguments easily. This demonstrates a typical Band 6 lexical profile.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay features a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating some ambitious structures like conditional clauses ('if children are taught to work hard...'). However, there is a notable frequency of grammatical errors and punctuation slips. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('both debates has'), fragment sentences ('While both debates has their strong points. I firmly believe...'), and article omissions or repetitions ('leading a a good life'). While these errors do not severely impede communication, they restrict the proportion of error-free sentences, making Band 5.5 or a solid Band 6 appropriate, leaning toward Band 5.5 due to the accumulation of basic structural slips.

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