Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-09-18

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough,the statement represents the deeply rooted narative in some cultures.This essay will explain the advantages and disadvanatages of this sayiing on children

While many debate that statement is encouraging but, I think i lacks the basic component.Trying hard to achieve your goals is a good thing but somethings are not meant to be your's no matter how hard you try.People should explain clearly that working hard is the basic step behind getting their dreams but losing your mind in the process is not valid. The saying can put alot of pressure on young minds and they will eventually lose their personalities.It would be tough for them to deal with mental trauma of failure once they don't get what they work hard for.

The quote can be a source of hope for many as well. It also creats a sense of responsibility among children so they work towards their goals with fire in their hearts. It also helps kids to dream big because now they know that their dreams are as far as they work for.

Overall, I think the cultural sayings can be a great source of hope among people specially young children but keeping in mind the harsh realities of life wwe should also train them to face failures and set backs. They should be strong enough to understand why few things won't work out no matter how hard you try and should continue living forward.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of telling children they can achieve anything. A position is presented, though it is slightly conversational and informal in places, such as "I think i lacks the basic component." Ideas are generally relevant, but the development remains somewhat basic and limited, leaning on general assertions rather than fully elaborated supporting points. For instance, the discussion on the negative psychological pressure is introduced but not fully explored with specific examples. Overall, the response fulfills the basic requirements of Task Response, aligning best with a Band 6.0 descriptor due to its somewhat under-developed ideas and limited depth in places.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a discernible introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. However, paragraphing is somewhat irregular; for example, the second paragraph is quite long and encompasses both the counter-argument and the drawbacks. Cohesive devices are sometimes mechanical or awkwardly placed (e.g., "While many debate that statement is encouraging but, I think..."), and punctuation errors such as missing spaces after commas (e.g., "try hard enough,the statement") negatively impact the flow. Referencing is occasionally unclear, making progression less smooth than required for higher bands. These features place the response firmly at Band 5.5, as cohesion and paragraphing require better control.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, demonstrating attempts at less common items such as "mental trauma," "deeply rooted," and "harsh realities." However, there are notable spelling errors ("narative" instead of narrative, "disadvanatages" instead of disadvantages, "sayiing" instead of saying, "alot" instead of a lot, "creats" instead of creates) and awkward word choices ("fire in their hearts," "continue living forward"). These lexical slips and spelling inaccuracies occasionally catch the reader's attention, although they do not completely impede communication. The lexical range is sufficient for a Band 6.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, such as conditional clauses ("once they don't get what they work hard for") and subordinate clauses. However, grammatical accuracy is inconsistent. There are frequent minor errors and punctuation issues, including comma splices ("try hard enough,the statement represents"), subject-verb agreement issues ("i lacks" instead of it lacks, "saying can put alot... and they will"), and missing articles. Although meaning remains generally clear, the frequency of errors prevents the writing from reaching a higher band. The grammar corresponds to a Band 5.5.

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