Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-09-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 4.0)

To begin with, there are serevel reasons why this topic is important in our daily life . The main reasons Children cultures hard enough can have dircet effect on children and society .

Many children face this issue in their daily lives , it can influence their lifestyle different way . For example , Children's work , education , Health , or relationships . In addition young people and families can also be influenced by this situation . Another important point that their Children cultures both positeve and negative effects . It mainy depends on how children use it and how they deal that their situation .

Moreover , there are some possible way to improve the situation . Children should have proper knowledge and should make responsible decisions . The government , Schools , families , and can also play an important role by providing guaidance and support . For instance , simple rules and better awareness can help children make better choices .

In conclusion , Children cultures , is an important issue that should not be ignored . If children and society wrok togather , tje children negative effects can be reduced and the situation can be improved.

The children have not mobile phone use not the watching movies , and lisitien to music and did not the mobile phone game . Only study on focus and paractial game For example , cricket , bedminton and with the other games . The children did not mind the stress and mind the freshment with otjer paractial games .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The response attempts to address the prompt regarding the advantages and disadvantages of telling children they can achieve anything through hard work, but the ideas remain extremely vague and underdeveloped. Key terms from the prompt, such as 'Children cultures', are used repetitively and incoherently instead of engaging directly with the psychological and practical implications of the message. The final paragraph veers off into an irrelevant list about mobile phones, movies, and practical games like cricket and badminton, which fails to answer the question. Consequently, the position is unclear and the development is limited. This aligns closely with Band 4 descriptors.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0

The response shows severe deficiencies in organisation and progression. While basic paragraph breaks are attempted, the internal logical structure of these paragraphs is frequently broken. Cohesive devices are used awkwardly or inaccurately, such as repetitive use of transitional phrases like 'To begin with' and 'Moreover' without connecting logical thoughts. Referencing is unclear, particularly with phrases like 'how children use it and how they deal that their situation'. There is no clear overall progression of argument, which places the response at Band 4.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.0

The vocabulary used is very basic and repetitive, with numerous instances of incorrect word choice and collocation that strain the reader's comprehension. Examples include 'Children cultures', 'deal that their situation', and 'mind the stress and mind the freshment'. The writer attempts to use more complex topic vocabulary, but the words are misused or pasted together without semantic clarity. Spelling and word formation errors are frequent throughout the response. This reflects the characteristics of a Band 4 performance.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0

The grammatical range is extremely limited, relying heavily on simple sentence skeletons with frequent structural errors. There is a total lack of control over complex sentence forms, and many sentences are grammatically incomplete or nonsensical, such as 'The children have not mobile phone use not the watching movies' and 'If children and society wrok togather , tje children negative effects can be reduced'. Errors in articles, prepositions, verb forms, and word order are pervasive and frequently impede communication, fitting the Band 4 descriptor.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.