Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-09-23

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 5.0)

It is very important to groom children from the early stages in order to make them motivated and mentally strong to achieve their goals and to face every chalange of life. In this regard the children are often told that they can achieve anything in their life if they work hard. As all the other things in the univerese this message also has some advantages as well as some disadvantages.

The advantage is that children become motivated and try to work hard as much as they can because they believe that they can get their desired goals if they keep working hard. It also makes them believe in their abilities and in some cases it also removes the inferiority complex among the children.

But this thing also has some disadvatages like if the children worked hard but due to some other reasons they were unable to achieve their goals and they become demotivated and disheart and start questioning their abilities which can sometimes lead to the extreme consequenses like suisides.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

The student addresses the prompt by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of telling children they can achieve anything. However, the response is significantly under-length, containing only 170 words compared to the minimum requirement of 250 words. This severe under-length prevents full development of the ideas. While the ideas introduced, such as increased motivation and the risk of severe demotivation or depression, are relevant, they remain underdeveloped due to the brevity of the response. Consequently, the task response is limited, which caps the score for this criterion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The text demonstrates a basic attempt at organization, divided into an introduction and two body paragraphs representing advantages and disadvantages. However, the cohesion is often mechanical and basic. For example, the transition 'The advantage is that...' and 'But this thing also has some disadvatages like...' lacks sophistication. Furthermore, the final paragraph consists of one extremely long, run-on sentence ('But this thing also has some disadvatages like if the children worked hard but due to some other reasons they were unable to achieve their goals and they become demotivated and disheart and start questioning their abilities which can sometimes lead to the extreme consequenses like suisides'), which disrupts the flow and logical progression of ideas.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is generally basic and repetitive, such as 'groom children', 'achieve their goals', and 'work hard'. There are also several spelling and word choice errors throughout the text, including 'chalange' (challenge), 'univerese' (universe), 'disadvatages' (disadvantages), 'disheart' (disheartened), and 'suisides' (suicides). While the writer attempts some less common phrases like 'inferiority complex', the lexical range remains limited and spelling errors occasionally strain the reader's comprehension.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The essay displays a very limited range of grammatical structures, heavily relying on simple and coordinate sentences joined by conjunctions like 'and'. The third paragraph is particularly problematic, featuring a single, overly long complex sentence that loses grammatical control and lacks appropriate punctuation. There are frequent errors in verb tense consistency, such as 'if the children worked hard' instead of 'if children work hard', along with spelling and punctuation lapses. These frequent errors affect readability and restrict the grammatical score.

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