Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-09-24
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?
Student answer (Band 5.0)
In the many societies, children are thinking that the hard work is the way of success, and they believe that one day they fulfill their dreams. While this meditation has significant benefits but also have few drawbacks.
Initially, in the few societies people encourage their children for too much study and the child work hard and do study day and night and spend more time in study and also in the rapacious of success but after in the particular stage he breaks fail then their trust is broken. They start their negative prospections about hard work. For example, a student wants to become a doctor but after their test and admission he fulfil their requirements but some time due to foo many fees he cannot continue their study so then he believes that hard work is not the proper solution of study better financial also be necessary.
On the other hand, there are also many disadvantages because success depends on many factors not only on efforts it also requires natural ability, motivation, financial background, after this when they fail in their mission. this can damage their mental health sometimes they go deeply in stress.
In conclusion, encouraging children to work hard and also motivate them in any field of life the students do their best and he does not feel any burden on their mind, but when he takes decision themself then he take wrong path which leads them to depression and demotivation.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
The response addresses the prompt by discussing the advantages and disadvantages of telling children they can achieve anything. However, the arguments are somewhat repetitive and lack deep development. The student attempts to establish a position, but the ideas are not always fully articulated, leading to a somewhat confused progression of thought. Furthermore, the response is 243 words long, falling slightly short of the 250-word minimum requirement. This negative length constraint has been factored into the overall Task Achievement assessment. Overall, the ideas are relevant to the topic of parental encouragement, but the lack of sufficient length and underdeveloped arguments prevent it from reaching a higher band score.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The essay is divided into paragraphs, though the transition between ideas is frequently awkward and lacks smooth logical sequencing. Cohesive devices are either missing or used inappropriately, such as using 'Initially, in the few societies' or switching between advantages and disadvantages rather abruptly. Paragraphing is attempted, but the internal structure of the paragraphs is weak, often resulting in long, run-on sentences that make it difficult to follow the main argument. The progression of ideas stalls due to poor referencing and repetitive phrasing.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is relatively basic and repetitive, with noticeable errors in word choice and collocation. Phrases such as 'meditation' (likely meaning mindset or belief), 'breaks fail', and 'negative prospections' impede readability and demonstrate a lack of precision. While the student attempts some less common vocabulary items like 'rapacious' or 'demotivation', these are misused. Spelling and word formation errors also occur, restricting the lexical score to the lower intermediate range.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5
The grammatical structures used are predominantly simple or faulty attempts at complex sentences. There are frequent errors in verb tense consistency, subject-verb agreement, and prepositions, such as 'children are thinking', 'do study day and night', and 'he fulfil their requirements'. Run-on sentences and comma splices are common throughout the text, and punctuation is generally weak. These persistent errors frequently cause strain for the reader and prevent the formation of error-free sentences.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.