Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-09-27
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?
Student answer (Band 6.0)
In some cultures, children are often told that if they work hard, they can achieve anything. There are several advantages to this message, as it can boost children's confidence and encourage them to work hard. However, it also has some disadvantages, including unrealistic expectations and self-blame in case they fail.
On the one hand, this message has several benefits, as it can boost children's confidence and encourage them to work hard. When children are taught that success requires effort, they may become more motivated to achieve their goals. For example, if a student wants to get higher grades, they may study harder and start putting more effort in their studies. Moreover, this sense of confidence can encourage them to keep trying even after failure, which helps them in their journey of achieving goals.
On the other hand, it comes with few major disadvantages, particularly unrealistic expectations and self-blame if they fail. Although encouraging childrens can build their confidence, it can create unrealistic expectations.Such as, they start believing that anything can be achieved. For instance, if a student try really hard to win a competition but lose, because other participents performed better, they may start blaming themselves, which can cause serious stress problems.
In conclusion, telling children that anything can be achieved is a good message, as it can encourage them to work hard and also boost their confidence. However, in some cases it may lead to unrealistic expectations of working hard and children may start blaming themselves thinking that they haven't worked enough.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5
The response addresses all parts of the task by identifying both the advantages and disadvantages of telling children they can achieve anything through hard work. The position is clear throughout, with the introduction and conclusion explicitly framing the writer's perspective. Ideas are generally well-developed and supported with relevant examples, such as a student working harder for higher grades to illustrate the advantages, and the risk of self-blame after losing a competition for the disadvantages. While the development of ideas could be pushed slightly further for a higher band, the response effectively covers all requirements of the prompt and satisfies the task fully.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The essay displays a clear logical organisation and progression throughout. It is structured into four distinct paragraphs, including an introduction, two body paragraphs focusing separately on advantages and disadvantages, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices are used reasonably well to guide the reader, employing transitional phrases like 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', and 'Moreover'. However, there are minor cohesion and referencing flaws, such as the slightly mechanical transition in the final paragraph and some minor punctuation issues around cohesive markers. Paragraphing is used sufficiently and appropriately, contributing to an overall coherent piece of writing.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common items such as 'unrealistic expectations', 'self-blame', and 'motivated'. There are, however, some word choice, collocation, and spelling errors throughout the text, such as 'encouraging childrens' instead of 'children', 'participents' instead of 'participants', and 'if a student try' instead of 'tries'. Despite these inaccuracies, the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the intended meaning clearly, and communication is never impeded. The range allows for adequate precision in discussing abstract concepts.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
The writer demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing conditional structures like 'if a student wants to get higher grades' and 'if a student try really hard'. There are several grammatical errors and lapses in agreement, notably subject-verb agreement issues ('if a student try', 'participents performed') and pluralisation errors ('encouraging childrens', 'serious stress problems'). Punctuation also lacks complete control in places, such as missing spaces after periods ('expectations.Such as'). Nevertheless, the structures used do not impede communication, and the writer shows a reasonable ability to handle complex sentences.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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