Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-09-27
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?
Student answer (Band 6.5)
It is often believed that children should be encouraged to believe that they can accomplish anything as long as they work hard. While this message can motivate children and develop a strong work ethic, it may also create unrealistic expectations and disappointment. This essay will discuss both the advantages and disadvantages of this approach.
One major advantage of giving children this message is that it can motivate them to work harder and remain determined when facing difficulties.
Explain: If children believe that effort can help them achieve their goals, they are more likely to persevere instead of giving up easily.
Develop: This attitude can build confidence, discipline and a willingness to learn from failure.
Example: For instance, a student who believes that consistent practice can improve academic performance may continue studying even after receiving poor marks initially.
Another benefit is that such a mindset can encourage children to set ambitious goals. They may become more willing to take on challenging tasks and develop their abilities through continuous effort.
On the other hand, telling children that they can achieve anything simply by trying hard can sometimes give them unrealistic expectations.
Explain: Success does not always depend entirely on effort, as factors such as natural abilities, financial circumstances, opportunities and external circumstances can also play a role.
Develop: Consequently, children may feel frustrated or blame themselves when they fail to achieve a particular goal despite working extremely hard.
Example: For example, a child may work hard to become a professional athlete but may not possess the physical abilities or opportunities required to reach that level.
Furthermore, this message can create unnecessary pressure. Children may feel that failure means they have not worked hard enough, which can negatively affect their confidence and enjoyment of learning.
In conclusion, encouraging children to believe in the power of hard work can make them more motivated, resilient and ambitious. However, presenting effort as the only requirement for success may lead to unrealistic expectations and unnecessary pressure. Therefore, children should be taught to value hard work while also understanding the importance of abilities, circumstances and realistic goal-setting.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 7.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5
The response fully addresses all parts of the task by examining both the advantages and disadvantages of telling children they can achieve anything through hard work. A clear position is established in the introduction and maintained throughout the essay. The ideas are well-developed and extended logically, supported by relevant reasoning and concrete examples, such as the student studying despite initial poor marks or a child aspiring to become a professional athlete. The response earns a band 7.0 for addressing all parts of the prompt with a clear position and well-supported ideas, showing a thorough understanding of the requirements.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The essay demonstrates clear logical organisation and progression throughout. Information and ideas are coherently arranged with a logical flow from the introduction to the body paragraphs and the conclusion. Paragraphing is used sufficiently and appropriately, with each paragraph focusing on a distinct aspect of the topic. Cohesive devices such as 'while', 'furthermore', and 'in conclusion' are used effectively to connect ideas, although some phrases like 'Explain:' and 'Develop:' used in the body paragraphs slightly interrupt the natural academic prose style. Overall, cohesion is well managed, justifying a band 7.0.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.5
The student uses a sufficient range of vocabulary with adequate flexibility and precision for the task. Words and phrases such as 'persevere', 'ambitious goals', 'unrealistic expectations', and 'external circumstances' demonstrate a good control of lexical items relevant to the topic. There is an attempt to use less common vocabulary with an awareness of style and collocation, and spelling and word-choice errors are absent. The lexical resource is solid and appropriate, earning a band 7.0 for its clear and precise communication.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 7.0
The response exhibits a good variety of complex structures alongside simple sentences, such as 'While this message can motivate children and develop a strong work ethic, it may also create unrealistic expectations and disappointment.' There is a high frequency of error-free sentences, and the student maintains good control of grammar and punctuation throughout. Complex structures are handled securely with minimal errors. This strong grammatical control and range place the response comfortably at a band 7.5.
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