Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-09-28

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 6.5)

In many societies, children are encouraged to believe that they can achieve anything if they work hard enough. This message can have several advantages, such as developing preservance and self-confidence, but it can also create unrealistic expectations and excessive preasure. This essay discuss booth the benefits and drawbacks of encouraging children to hold this believe.

One major advantages is that this message can develop preserverance. When they believe that efforts can help them to overcome difficulties, they are more likely to continue trying instead of giving up when they encounter obstacles. Another benefit is that it can strengthen their self-confidence and encourage them to set ambotious goal. For instance, a student who perform poorly in an examination may belief that studying harder can improve their results, so they work more consistently and eventually achieve better grades. Therfore, this believe can teach children to remain determined and develop a positive attitude toward challenges.

However, there are also some disadvantages to giving children this message. The first is that it can create unrealistic expectations because success does not associate entirely on effort. Factors such as natural ability, financial circumstances, opportunities and unexpected events can also effect whether someone achieve a particular goal. A second drawback is that children may experience unnecessary preasure or blame themselves when they fail. For example, a children who work hard to become a professional athlete but cannot achieve this because of an injury may believe that they simply did not try hard enough. This can lead disappointment and reduce their self-esteem.

In conclusion, telling children that they can achieve anything through hard work can promote preserverance and self-confidence. Nevertheless, it can also create unrealistic expectations and cause children to put excessive burden on themselves when they do not succeed. Therefore, children should be encouraged to work hard while also being taught that success depend on efforts as well as abilityy, opportunities and circumstances.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The response successfully addresses all parts of the task by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of telling children they can achieve anything. The student maintains a clear position throughout the essay, introducing the stance in the introduction and reinforcing it in the conclusion. Ideas are adequately extended and supported with relevant explanations and examples, such as the student improving exam grades or the athlete failing due to an injury. While some arguments could be explored in greater depth to reach a higher band, the overall coverage is solid, meeting the requirements of a Band 7 performance under Task Achievement.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay displays a clear logical organisation and progression throughout. Information and ideas are coherently structured, with each paragraph having a distinct central topic. The student makes good use of cohesive devices to guide the reader, such as 'One major advantages', 'Another benefit', and 'However, there are also some disadvantages'. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Although some minor referencing or transition awkwardness is present, the overarching flow is logical, aligning well with the Band 7 descriptors for Coherence and Cohesion.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The student demonstrates an adequate and sufficient range of vocabulary for the task, attempting less common lexical items such as 'preserverance' (spelled 'preservance' initially), 'unrealistic expectations', and 'self-esteem'. However, there are notable spelling errors ('preservance', 'ambotious', 'preasure', ' Therfore', 'effect' instead of 'affect', 'abilityy') and word-formation slips ('success does not associate entirely', 'lead disappointment'). These lexical inaccuracies and spelling mistakes prevent the response from achieving a higher band, placing it firmly at a Band 6.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

The writer uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including conditional structures and relative clauses. There is good variety in sentence structures, such as 'When they believe that efforts can help them to overcome difficulties, they are more likely to continue trying...' However, there are several grammatical and agreement errors throughout the text, such as 'This essay discuss booth' (discusses both), 'One major advantages' (advantage), 'a student who perform' (performs), 'a children' (a child), and 'success depend' (depends). These errors do not impede overall communication, but their frequency prevents the score from rising above Band 6.0.

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