Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-09-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In the recent times, parents telling their telling their children that they can achieve everything with hardwork regardless of how difficult it is ace has become increasingly popular phenomenon. While this development brings several notable draw backs, such as over confidence. It also presents some advantages like having a sense of self-believe.

On one hand, there are several convincing argument in the favour of this trend. First and foremost, child develop a sense of self- believe, which leads him to set his bar high. These children later try their best to make it happen in real life. In most of cases, these highly confident kids achieve their high value goals. For instance, former captain of Pakistan cricket team Imran khan, he has a similar mindset as mentioned in trend. As a result he achieved most of his goals, such as winning cricket world cup for nation and building cancer hospital.

On the other hand, the negative impacts associated with this trend should not be ignored. The main concern regarding this issue is the superiority complex. This kind of toxic traits are developed in children, who are told that they can do anything. Moreover, childrens having this trait develop overconfidence and instead of working hard for goals, they mostly sit back and relax, believing that they will achieve their goals no matter what. Consequently, they fails to make their marks whether in academics or sports

In conclusion, although this trend carries drawback such as overconfidence, the positive aspects such as self-believe make it a valueable overall development.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of telling children they can achieve anything. A clear position is established in the introduction and maintained throughout the essay. Main ideas are presented, such as self-belief and overconfidence, and supported with an example regarding Imran Khan. However, some ideas lack full extension and tend to generalise, placing the response firmly at Band 6.0. Specifically, the explanation of the negative impacts remains somewhat superficial, and the example provided, while relevant, is integrated with minor logical leaps. Overall, all parts of the task are addressed adequately, but development needs greater depth and precision to reach higher bands.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a logical progression of ideas. Paragraphing is used appropriately, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs addressing advantages and disadvantages respectively, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices are employed, such as 'On one hand', 'On the other hand', and 'In conclusion', to guide the reader through the argument. However, referencing and cohesion are sometimes faulty or mechanical, as seen in phrases like 'a similar mindset as mentioned in trend' and slight awkwardness in paragraph transitions. Paragraph-internal progression is occasionally disrupted by abrupt sentence structures. Consequently, the organization satisfies the requirements for a Band 6.0.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting less common items such as 'phenomenon', 'draw backs', 'superiority complex', and 'overconfidence'. However, there are noticeable spelling and word choice errors throughout the text, including 'hardwork', 'draw backs', 'self-believe' (used instead of the noun 'self-belief'), 'childrens', and 'valueable'. Furthermore, collocations are occasionally unnatural, such as 'make their marks'. These lexical inaccuracies do not impede communication, but they restrict the score to a Band 5.5, reflecting a mix of adequate attempts and persistent elementary errors.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting structures such as conditional and participial clauses ('regardless of how difficult it is', 'believing that they will achieve their goals'). However, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement and pluralisation, as demonstrated in 'parents telling their telling their children', 'child develop', 'kids achieve', and 'they fails'. Punctuation errors are also present, such as sentence fragments ('It also presents some advantages like having a sense of self-believe.'). Because errors occur frequently alongside a limited variety of successfully controlled complex structures, the writing aligns best with Band 5.0.

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