Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-09-29
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Most of parents often tell their children that they can reach anything if they work hard enough. This essay will express the advantages and the disadvantages of giving children this message.
On one hand, parents should support their kids because their words motivate the kids and make them do efforts to achieve their dreams, for example thomas Adisson's mother received a letter from her son's school, so she told Thomas that the teacher said that you are the smartest student, meanwhile the message said the opposite exactly that thomas was so stupid. After some years thomas became a brilliant man not because of his intelligence but due to his mother and her beautiful lie. So children could thrive with their parents's support, maybe just some intense words will change their paths to the best.
On the other hand, parents may affect their children negatively by encourageing them even thow they know that thing is impossible to achieve, for instance some father was telling his son that he will win the first place in the race but he know that he is not the fastest so the child did a great training before the race but unfortunetly he did not win so as a result he will not trust his father and his capacity again.
In conclusion, parents must always be the super fans of their kids in every competition or exam, in the same time they do not have to exceed their supports in impossible dreams to avoid the disapointement of their kids.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
The response addresses the prompt by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of telling children they can achieve anything. A position is presented, and the main ideas are extended with examples. The first body paragraph discusses motivation through parental support, citing an anecdote about Thomas Edison, while the second explores the potential negative psychological impact of unrealistic expectations. However, the examples provided, such as the Edison anecdote and the racing father scenario, are somewhat anecdotal and lack general academic breadth. Furthermore, some ideas tend to over-generalize. Overall, all parts of the task are addressed adequately, placing this response at Band 6.0 according to the task response descriptors.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear introduction, two body paragraphs representing opposing views, and a concluding paragraph. Paragraphing is used appropriately to structure the argument. Cohesive devices such as 'On one hand', 'On the other hand', 'for instance', and 'In conclusion' are employed to guide the reader through the text. However, referencing is occasionally imprecise, and logical progression within the paragraphs is somewhat mechanical. For instance, the transition between the Edison anecdote and the broader conclusion in the second paragraph feels slightly abrupt. These minor faults in cohesion and referencing align the response with Band 6.0.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, allowing the student to communicate their ideas clearly. There are attempts to use less common items and phrases, such as 'intense words', 'unforetunately', and 'disapointement', though these are accompanied by spelling and word-choice inaccuracies (e.g., 'Most of parents', 'make them do efforts' instead of 'make an effort', and 'encourageing'). While vocabulary is sufficient for communication, spelling errors ('thomas Adisson', 'encourageing', 'thow', 'unfortunetly', 'disapointement') and occasional awkward collocations prevent the lexical score from reaching Band 7.0, making Band 6.0 a fitting assessment.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
The writer uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, including conditional and relative clauses. There are several grammatical errors and punctuation lapses throughout the text, such as comma splices and missing articles (e.g., 'Most of parents', 'thomas Adisson's mother received a letter', 'some father was telling his son', and 'he know'). Although these errors are noticeable and require the reader to occasionally adjust, they do not severely impede overall communication. The command of grammar is characteristic of Band 5.5 to 6.0; because the complex structures are generally understandable despite the errors, a Band 6.0 is awarded.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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