Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-09-30

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 5.0)

ln some communities, juveniles are often told that they can fufill anything if they try hard enough .

Firstly, it builds self confident and makes one independent. Teenagers who often abide from the advice of their elderly one's will achieve their desired goals in future. and it creates self confident not to rely on their relatives. for examples a student who is on his long vacation can engage in some per time jobs, which can help him to be able to pay some of his dues in school without relying one anyone.

Despite the pontential benefits of teenagers who listen to the advice of their parents, one significant disavatages is that it creates desperation. In some situation when a child is being pressured, by his relatives may go astray by joing band gang sand may result to bad effects to him self . for

a student who engage in cybercrime might end up in police jail which is not good to the society .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response attempts to address both the advantages and disadvantages of telling children they can achieve anything. However, the task requirement is NOT met regarding length, as the essay contains only 164 words, falling significantly short of the 250-word minimum. This severely limits the development of ideas. While the student identifies an advantage (building self-confidence and independence, supported by a brief example of a student doing part-time work) and a disadvantage (desperation leading to negative outcomes like cybercrime), these points remain underdeveloped due to the restricted word count. Consequently, the response can only be awarded a band 4.0 for Task Achievement, as the under-length nature of the text prevents a fully realised discussion of the prompt.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The essay is divided into three brief paragraphs, including an introduction and two body paragraphs, but lacks a formal conclusion. Logical organisation is attempted through transitional markers such as 'Firstly' and 'Despite the pontential benefits', providing a basic structure. However, paragraphing and overall cohesion are disjointed. For instance, sentences like 'and it creates self confident not to rely on their relatives' are awkwardly fragmented and disrupt the flow. Referencing is sometimes unclear, and cohesive devices are used mechanically rather than flexibly. The progression of ideas stalls because the paragraphs are too brief and lack internal cohesion. Overall, the structural coherence aligns best with a band 5.0 descriptor, where some organisation is present but overall progression is limited.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The lexical range is quite limited and repetitive, which is partly due to the short length of the text. The student attempts some less common vocabulary, such as 'desperation', 'cybercrime', and 'independent', but these are accompanied by noticeable spelling and word choice errors. Examples include 'fufill' instead of fulfill, 'confident' used instead of confidence, 'per time' instead of part-time, and 'disavatages' instead of disadvantages. Furthermore, phrases like 'joing band gang sand may result to bad effects' demonstrate weak collocation and awkward phrasing. These lexical inaccuracies occasionally cause difficulty for the reader, fitting the profile of a band 5.0 response, where the vocabulary is minimally adequate for the task but constrained by frequent errors.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The student attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, such as 'Teenagers who often abide from the advice of their elderly one's will achieve their desired goals in future.' However, grammatical control is weak, and errors are frequent throughout the text. There are persistent issues with subject-verb agreement, article usage, punctuation, and prepositional phrasing, such as 'abide from' instead of follow, 'elderly one's' instead of elders, and 'relying one anyone' instead of anyone. Complex sentences are frequently faulty, and run-on sentences or fragments impede readability in places like 'for examples a student who is on his long vacation can engage...'. These frequent errors place the grammar firmly at a band 5.0 level, where structures are limited and errors cause some difficulty for the reader.

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