Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-09-30

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In many cultures, young minds are taught that anything can be accomplished if they work hard enough. This norm carries various pros and cons that that are non-negotiable. However i believe that its advantages out weights its disadvantages.

One of the biggest drawback is that people think they can do exceptionally well if they continue with the tough work but in practical life, smart work is often valued more than hard work.

Another influential factor is that in many fields of life, things tend to go as planned by the privileged. For instance, a candidate for a job might work day and night to get selected but still get rejected only because the interviewer has been bribed. In such cases, hard work and capability is neglected when other authoritues are involved unfairly.

These experiences leaves an individual forlorn and agitated, he feels powerless when the foundation of his beliefs are proven false.

On the other hand, this quote can empower and motivate a child to achieve great things in life. A student who belives in hard work is often sen to beat the intellectually gifted classmates.

It also helps people belonging from poor class to break the cycle of poverty and rise high enough as the upper class. It is only made possible when a chil belives in hard wirk rather than fate only.

It makes a children self-believing and disciplined. Such people tend to improve themselves continuesly and prove to be rather influential individuals of society.

In conclusion, It can be said that faith in one's own hard work in childhood can help a person in developing helpful qualities such as consistency in life. However merely depending on mental or physical labour in real life can be draining and inefficient.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of telling children they can achieve anything. A clear position is stated in the introduction and maintained throughout the essay. The ideas presented are relevant, such as the tension between hard work versus smart work and privilege, alongside positive aspects like motivation and breaking the cycle of poverty. However, some ideas feel slightly underdeveloped and rely on over-generalisation or extreme examples, such as bribery in hiring processes. While the arguments are generally clear and effectively deployed, more precise elaboration would elevate the development further. Overall, the task is successfully fulfilled, placing this response comfortably at Band 6.5, which rounds to a solid Band 6 for Task Achievement based on the descriptors.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with clear logical organisation. The writer uses basic cohesive devices and transitions like 'On the other hand' and 'In conclusion' to signal shifts in argumentation. Paragraphing is utilised, though some paragraphs are quite short or contain multiple distinct ideas. Referencing is occasionally faulty, such as 'these experiences leaves' where pronoun agreement and linking suffer. Additionally, cohesive devices are sometimes mechanical rather than flexible. While progression is generally clear, the lack of sophisticated linking and occasional clunky transitions prevent the essay from reaching a higher band. These characteristics align well with the Band 6 descriptor for Coherence and Cohesion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting less common items such as 'forlorn and agitated', 'privileged', and 'consistently'. However, there are noticeable word choice errors and spelling mistakes throughout the text, including 'out weights' instead of 'outweighs', 'drawback' instead of 'drawbacks', 'authoritues', 'belives', 'sen', 'chil', 'wirk', and 'continuesly'. These errors indicate a lack of precision, though they rarely impede overall communication. The vocabulary control is sufficient to convey meaning, but the frequency of spelling and morphological slips caps the score at Band 5.5.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response exhibits a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating attempts at subordination and relative clauses. However, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly regarding subject-verb agreement and punctuation. Examples include 'pros and cons that that are non-negotiable', 'However i believe', 'These experiences leaves', and 'It makes a children'. Commas are sometimes misused or omitted, and capitalization errors are present ('In conclusion, It can be said'). While these errors do not severely impede communication, they occur with enough frequency to prevent the higher level of accuracy seen at Band 7. The structural variety and control point directly to a Band 6.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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