Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-09-30
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?
Student answer (Band 5.0)
In this modern era, where competition is tough and inflation is high, we must focus on the development of the children in such a way that they can easily adjust in this competitive world. In my opinion encrouging children in such a way that they can achieve anything if they try hard has many advantages. While some disagree with the point and highlights the disadvantages but the positive outcomes are more than simply denying the statement.
Children are the gift from the god. They are simple and innocent. It totally depends on our upbringing that how they are going to react or behave in this world. We can mould their minds and make them strong to compete in this world. From the starting, if we are nourishing their attitude that they can achieve everything, helps them in making rational decisions. It also encourages them to act sensibly in a tough circumstances. Their thinking ability is more enhanced and comes out with the best possible solution. For example, if a child is belongs to a middle class family and he have a dream of having the most expensive car in the family, he/she can achieve its goal to make the ends meet. Their cognitive mind is already shaped in such a way that they can achieve anything if they work hard enough.
In conlusion, nothing is impossible in this universe. Scientist have remarkably achieved the first pictures of sun and they were also child once but their determination make this happened.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
The response attempts to address both the advantages and disadvantages of telling children they can achieve anything, although the coverage of disadvantages is extremely brief and superficial. The student states that some disagree and highlight disadvantages, but immediately reverts back to supporting the positive outcomes. The position is somewhat clear, but the ideas are limited and under-developed, particularly regarding the disadvantages. The example provided about a middle-class family wanting an expensive car to make ends meet is illogical and does not effectively support the argument. Furthermore, the conclusion introduces a completely new and irrelevant example about scientists photographing the sun, which fails to properly synthesise the main points of the prompt. These limitations in task coverage and idea extension place the response firmly in the band 5 range, as the task is addressed only partially and the arguments lack thorough development and logical consistency.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The essay displays some basic organization, separating the introduction, body, and conclusion into distinct paragraphs. However, there is no clear overall progression of ideas, especially because the transition between discussing advantages and acknowledging disadvantages is poorly handled in the opening paragraph. Cohesive devices are used rather mechanically and sometimes inaccurately, such as the transition 'In conlusion, nothing is impossible in this universe.' Referencing is also occasionally unclear, such as pronoun usage referring back to plural and singular nouns confusingly. Paragraphing is attempted, but the body paragraph is overly dense and combines multiple loosely related thoughts without clear logical bridges. Because the progression is disrupted and cohesive devices are inadequate or misused, the response aligns with band 5 for coherence and cohesion.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is generally basic and repetitive, showing a limited range that is only minimally adequate for the task. There are noticeable spelling and word-choice errors throughout the text, such as 'encrouging' instead of encouraging, 'god' with an inappropriate capitalisation, 'starting' instead of start, and 'conlusion' instead of conclusion. The student attempts some less common vocabulary, such as 'cognitive mind' and 'rational decisions', but these phrases are either slightly unnatural or awkwardly collocated. These errors and the restricted vocabulary range occasionally cause difficulty for the reader and reflect the descriptors for band 5, where lexical limitations become a noticeable constraint on precise communication.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, but attempts at complex structures are frequently faulty. There are numerous grammatical errors throughout the text, including subject-verb agreement issues like 'if a child is belongs' and pronoun mismatches such as 'he have a dream'. Articles and prepositions are also misused in places, such as 'in a tough circumstances' and 'achieved the first pictures of sun'. Punctuation and spelling errors further detract from the overall accuracy. While the meaning can generally be deciphered with some effort, the frequency of errors places this response at band 5, as grammatical control is weak and frequent mistakes impede fluency.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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