Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 5.0)

It is often argued that children can achieve their goals when they work hard on themselves. This essay wil discuss advantage and disadvantage sides of this message.

On the one hand, the message had a number of positive sides. The major advantage is that it encourages children to work hard and never give up. They can improve their skills and learn news. And, they try them in the practice. At that time, they may become confidence and believe in themselves. For example, the student who enhance his or her grade day by day, because all the time he or she study without breaks. Children also gain knowledge through hard work and study. They may exceed experience about everything.

On the other hand, there are several disadvantage views about the message. For instance, children think that they can achieve their goals only hard work and study. However, it depends some feelings, like luck, succes and talent. If the student who really hard gains knowledge, but he or she does not obtain anything. The learner feels less confidence or proud.

In conclusion, it is good for telling youngers to work hard. Whereas, not only the succes depends to the hard work and study, but also feelings such as, luck, confidence and talent. However, i believe that these feelings must need to student because they do not suffer from fails, in contrast, they can enjoy their achievements.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

Javob topshiriqni qisman yoritadi: unda ham afzalliklar, ham kamchiliklar keltirilgan, biroq fikrlar cheklangan va yetarlicha rivojlantirilmagan. Masalan, muallif xabar bolalarni hech qachon taslim bo‘lmaslikka undashini aytadi, ammo bu fikr batafsil izohlar bilan kengaytirilmagan va asoslanmagan. Bundan tashqari, uzunlik talabi bajarilmagan: javob atigi 234 so‘zdan iborat bo‘lib, 250 so‘zlik minimumga yetmaydi. Muallifning pozitsiyasi ma’lum darajada anglashiladi, biroq umumiy fikr rivoji yuqoriroq band uchun zarur bo‘lgan chuqurlik va aniqlikka ega emas.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

Oddiy paragraflarga ajratish hamda 'On the one hand' va 'On the other hand' kabi odatiy kirish iboralari orqali ma’lum darajada tartib borligi ko‘rinadi. Biroq matn bo‘ylab aniq umumiy izchillik yo‘q, bog‘lovchi vositalar esa ko‘pincha yetarli emas, noto‘g‘ri qo‘llangan yoki takrorlangan. Masalan, o‘tish iboralari sun’iy tuyuladi, ayrim havolalar esa noaniq. Xususan, xulosa qismidagi ('these feelings') olmoshi nimaga ishora qilayotgani borasida chalkashlik tug‘diradi.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

Lug‘at boyligi cheklangan va mavzuni muhokama qilish uchun zo‘rg‘a yetarli. So‘z tanlash, so‘z shakli va imloda sezilarli xatolar bor, ular ba’zan o‘quvchiga tushunishni qiyinlashtiradi. Bunga 'advantage and disadvantage sides', 'learn news', 'become confidence' va 'succes' kabi iboralar misol bo‘ladi. Muallif kamroq uchraydigan so‘zlardan foydalanishga urinadi, biroq noto‘g‘ri so‘z birikmalari va takroriy imlo xatolari lug‘at boyligi bo‘yicha natijani shu darajada cheklab qo‘yadi.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

Yozuvda grammatik tuzilmalar doirasi cheklangan: asosan sodda gaplarga tayanilgan, murakkab gap tuzishga urinishlar esa ko‘pincha xato. Fe’l shakllari, artikllar, predloglar va ega-kesim mosligida tez-tez xatolar uchraydi. Masalan: 'the message had a number', 'depend some feelings' va 'must need to student'. Bunday takroriy xatolar o‘quvchiga matnni tushunishni qiyinlashtirishi va sodda hamda murakkab gap tuzilmalarini izchil nazorat qilish yetishmasligini ko‘rsatishi mumkin.

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