Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Hard work is the primary driver behind one's success. But it does not always provide the result one is hoping for. Therefore, we need to teach our young generation the necessity of industry along with the resilience of facing failures.

Industry is the key to success. The message 'One can achieve anything if he tries hard enough' portrays this theme. During our childhood, we have heard this particular saying at least once. It is quite motivating. It gives children the notion that they have endless possibilities. Consequently, they can succeed in any path or profession if they put their hearts into the pursuit. As a result, children feel confident and become energized to give their maximum effort. Therefore, young generation will learn the value of perseverence and hard work. Ultimately, if they can develop the habit of hard work, they can adapt to the difficult situations in life with more ease.

However, the result of each endeavor is not in the hands of oneself. One can work very hard. Yet the result may not go in his way. Moreover, each task demand different aptitudes or capabilities. Some tasks might require strong physique, some might demand high cognitive skills, some might need beauty. Therefore, different career choices can be easier for ones who match the inhererant requirements. It might be completely irrelevant of one's effort and hard work. The world is biased and it is not always fair or just. It will appear as a shock to a child who believes only his efforts can determine whether he will succeed of not. He will surely feel betrayed by the adults preaching him these messages. Consequently, he might feel disheartened and fall into depression. Therefore, teaching him the importance of hard work as well as the coping mechanisms with failure are equally foundamental for preparing him to the adversities of real life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The response successfully addresses all parts of the prompt by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of telling children they can achieve anything. The position is clear throughout, and relevant ideas are presented, such as increased motivation and confidence as an advantage, and potential disappointment or depression as a drawback. However, some ideas are more fully developed than others, which prevents a higher score. For example, the point about different aptitudes like physical skills or cognitive abilities is introduced in the final paragraph but remains somewhat underdeveloped in terms of its broader implications. To reach the next level, the writer needs to extend and support all main arguments with deeper explanations or more detailed examples, ensuring every point receives equal weight and thorough exploration.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear logical progression from introduction to discussing advantages, followed by disadvantages, and a concluding thought. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct ideas, and basic cohesive devices are employed, such as 'Consequently', 'As a result', and 'Moreover'. However, cohesion can occasionally feel mechanical or formulaic, and referencing is not always completely clear, such as the ambiguous pronoun shifts between 'one', 'he', and 'they'. To improve, the writer should use a wider variety of cohesive devices more flexibly and ensure that referencing nouns and pronouns across sentences creates smoother, more natural transitions without relying on repetitive connectors.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, demonstrating an attempt to incorporate less common items such as 'industry', 'perseverance', 'aptitudes', and 'adversities'. There is a sufficient range to communicate the main points clearly, although some word choices and collocations are slightly unnatural, such as 'resilience of facing failures' instead of resilience in facing failures, and 'inhererant requirements' containing a spelling error. Other minor lexical slips, such as 'foundamental' instead of fundamental, do not impede communication. To achieve a higher band, the writer must expand their vocabulary range, demonstrate more precision in word choice and phrasing, and eliminate spelling and collocation inaccuracies.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

The writer uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating an ability to construct compound and complex clauses like 'It will appear as a shock to a child who believes only his efforts can determine whether he will succeed or not.' There are some grammatical errors and awkward prepositions present, such as 'preparing him to the adversities' instead of preparing him for the adversities, and minor article or agreement inconsistencies. However, these errors are relatively infrequent and rarely impede communication. To move up to a higher level, the essay needs a wider variety of complex structures deployed with greater frequency and accuracy, ensuring that most complex sentences remain completely error-free.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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