Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-04

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 4.0)

There is no reson to criticize parent for such advice as it has lot of benifits and enormous advantages for all of us.I absolutly favor for children there are solid reason behind him.The following easy will bright to light some hidden and glorious benifits of such message by elders

i woluld like to indroduce the benifits and drawbacks od such adives in my opinion there is only advantages of it.When we ask our children work hard and achive everything that you want when our teenagers learn that there is only way to get sucess in his life. The first benifit is that our children do not think about wrong way to want success in his life because they it is not a right way to achive his target .As in such cultures the youth definitely get success to wark hard in his life. The disadvantages of message from parents and teachers its happen when the children think that he can get such things that are illegel whent we tries to achive such things and he failed .

we often make the mistake social issue like when the childrent

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

The response only partially addresses the task. While the prompt asks for the advantages and disadvantages of telling children they can achieve anything through hard work, the student struggles to present a clear, developed position. The length requirement is also not met, as the response falls significantly short of the 250-word minimum, containing only 188 words. The ideas regarding both benefits and drawbacks are extremely limited, repetitive, and under-developed, such as stating that children 'do not think about wrong way' without further elaboration or support. To reach a higher band, the writer must meet the word count requirement, ensure all parts of the prompt are fully explored, and extend their main ideas with relevant examples and logical explanations.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 3.5

The organization of the text presents a significant challenge to progression and readability. The essay lacks clear logical sequencing and appropriate paragraphing, with ideas blending together into a disorganised block of text. Cohesive devices are either missing or used inaccurately, making it difficult to follow the writer's train of thought. References, such as pronouns like 'him' and 'it', are frequently unclear and create confusion regarding what is being referred to. To improve in this criterion, the writer needs to group related ideas into distinct paragraphs, use clear topic sentences, and employ a wider, more accurate range of cohesive markers to connect sentences and paragraphs logically.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, reflecting a limited range that strains the reader's understanding. There are frequent spelling errors throughout the response, such as 'reson', 'benifits', 'absolutly', 'easy', 'indroduce', 'adives', 'achive', 'sucess', and 'whent', as well as word form and choice issues like 'favor for children' and 'wark hard'. While the writer attempts to discuss a complex topic, the numerous lexical inaccuracies impede smooth communication. To achieve a higher score, the student must expand their vocabulary range, learn the correct spelling of common words, and improve their control of word choices and collocations in written English.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The grammatical structures used are very limited, and the text contains frequent errors in sentence structure, verb forms, agreement, and articles. The attempt at complex sentences often results in faulty phrasing, such as 'when the children think that he can get such things that are illegel whent we tries to achive such things and he failed', which causes considerable difficulty for the reader. There are also persistent issues with subject-verb agreement and punctuation, such as missing capitalization and run-on sentences. To move to a higher band, the writer needs to demonstrate a greater variety of sentence patterns with improved accuracy and ensure that basic grammatical rules are consistently applied.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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