Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-05
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?
Student answer (Band 5.0)
Now a days,Smart work has completely replace hard work however, there are still people who belives that hard work is the key to success. In many part of the world, kids are frequently advised to work hard to achieve anything. There are several advanatages as well as disadvantages of giving this advice, and I will discuss both below.
Overall, In many cultures, Parents and teachers taught childrens to only work hard to achieve success which may be correct to some extent, However there can be several implications in a long run
First of all, Elders should always help the childrens in achieving goals. In the early age, childrens are mostly careless and they don't know how to acheive a task. Giving them direction or advise help them to complete the task. Moreover, advice allow the childrens to know what things they need to do to achieve success.
On the other hand, There are some disadvantages as well. Now a days, Most of the culture follow smart work instead of hard work. Giving advices to only work hard will demotivate kids when they are unable to achieve any task. Instead of giving advice, Childrens should be tought to make their own decision which will make them more confident and self driven.
To conclude with, There are numerous advantages as well as disadvantages of suggesting the childrens to work hard in order achieve anything. However, I think childrens should be allowed to make their own decision without giving any message which can limit their thinking.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
The response addresses the task only partially, presenting both advantages and disadvantages, but the ideas remain limited and under-developed. For instance, the writer mentions that giving the message that hard work leads to anything can demotivate kids when they fail, but this point is not fully expanded with clear explanations or supporting examples. The position is stated at the beginning and the end, but the overall development lacks depth and fails to cover all aspects of the prompt comprehensively. To move to a higher band, the writer would need to extend their arguments fully, providing concrete examples and deeper analysis for both the positive and negative implications of this cultural messaging.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
There is some organisation evident in the text, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, but it lacks a clear overall progression. Paragraphing is attempted, though the placement and grouping of ideas feel somewhat disjointed, such as the abrupt second introductory paragraph. Cohesive devices are used, but they tend to be repetitive and occasionally inaccurate, like the mechanical repetition of 'First of all' and 'On the other hand'. Referencing is also sometimes unclear, with pronouns not always linking smoothly to their antecedents. To improve, the writer needs to ensure a smoother logical flow between paragraphs and employ a wider, more accurate range of cohesive features to connect ideas naturally.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is limited and minimally adequate for the task, featuring basic items and noticeable errors that occasionally cause some difficulty for the reader. There are frequent spelling and word choice errors, such as 'belives' instead of 'believes', 'advanatages' instead of 'advantages', 'acheive' instead of 'achieve', and 'tought' instead of 'taught'. The writer attempts some less common vocabulary, but issues with word form and collocation prevent precise expression. To achieve a higher score, the writer must expand their lexical range, pay closer attention to word formation and spelling, and use more precise vocabulary related to the topic of education and motivation.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response demonstrates a limited range of structures, relying primarily on simple sentences alongside attempts at complex forms that are frequently faulty. There are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation that can cause difficulty for the reader, including capitalization issues ('Now a days', 'Smart work', 'Parents'), article misuse ('in a long run', 'in the early age'), and subject-verb agreement errors like 'Parents and teachers taught childrens'. Pluralisation is also handled incorrectly in words like 'childrens'. To improve, the writer needs to increase control over basic grammatical structures, eliminate frequent errors in plurals and articles, and ensure that complex sentence structures are constructed accurately.
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