Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In few cultures, parents are frequently saying to children that they can achieve anything in the world if children give they best. it has its own benefits and drawbacks. this essay will disscuss both advantages and disadvantage.

One significant advantage is it helps to motivate children even they fail. if no encourages them in the tough times then they might lose interst on life, which may cost thier life.so, when parents give constant motivation and encourages them then they try hard to achieve anything in life, which help to create many milestones and experice new things in life. another benift is helps to develop skills.when children tries hard to achieve success in life in that process they may fail some times and get success somtimes during this process they learn may thing and skills from the setbacks . so, they can implement it in future by their experience.

The primary disadvantage is creates excessive pressure on children. when they try hard enough to achieve something in thier life and if they get bad outcomes, then it often leads to stress and frustration, which can cause many mental problems in the young age. another drawback is causes disappointment.when children try very hard to accomplish anything and gets bad results, then they may lack thier confidence which stop the personal growth and also stops children to take brave steps in future. due to this, children stops thinking creatively because of the set backs they faced.

In conclusion, it has both advantages and disadvantages. Although it can motivate children, it may also disappointment children which stop there personal growth.I belive that disadvantages outweigh advantages.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of telling children they can achieve anything. A clear position is presented in the conclusion where you state that the disadvantages outweigh the advantages. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. While you introduce relevant points such as motivation and excessive pressure, some ideas remain under-developed or briefly stated without sufficient elaboration or concrete examples. To reach a higher level, you should extend and fully support your main arguments with deeper explanations or relevant illustrations, ensuring that every point is thoroughly explored from beginning to end.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear structure that includes an introduction, body paragraphs for advantages and disadvantages, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate different main ideas. Nevertheless, cohesion is sometimes mechanical and referencing is not always clear, as seen in repetitive sentence starters like "when children try hard" and transitional limitations. To improve further, you should use a wider and more flexible range of cohesive devices and ensure that referencing words link ideas smoothly across sentences, creating a stronger sense of logical progression throughout the text.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

Your vocabulary is adequate for the task and allows you to communicate your basic ideas about motivation and pressure. You make attempts at less common vocabulary, but these are accompanied by noticeable errors in word choice, word form, and spelling, such as writing "disscul" instead of discuss, "interst" instead of interest, "thier" instead of their, and "benift" instead of benefit. Furthermore, phrasing can be unnatural in places, such as saying "cost thier life". To achieve a higher band, you need to expand your lexical range, improve your spelling accuracy, and use words with greater precision and stylistic appropriateness.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence forms in your writing. However, there are frequent errors in basic grammar, punctuation, and capitalization, such as missing capital letters at the beginning of sentences like "it has its own benefits", incorrect prepositions, and grammatical inaccuracies in verb forms such as "children gives they best" or "children stops thinking". Although these errors rarely impede overall communication, they persist throughout the text. To move up to the next band, you should aim to increase the proportion of error-free sentences and exercise better control over punctuation, capitalization, and complex grammatical structures.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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