Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In some societies, children are encouraged that they can accomplish any goal by work hard. Advantage of this situation could generate high level of confidence while the negative aspect would be the developement of feeling of being disheart because of failure.

the brighjter side of such kind of brought-up will results in confident personality developement, beacause children got inspiration from their parents and follow their instructions carefully. once they try to achhieve any target successfully they become more motivated to attain futher achievements in their lives. Moreover, multiple success can help them to develop a more stronger and respectful personality.Another advantage of this kind of personbality developement is siuch type of children always feel independent and can make decissions freely whenever they feel in their lives that now they have to take a strong attempt for numerous occassions.

The negative side of this behaviour could have disastrous effects on personality of a child because if a child is habitual of enjoying success everytime and after doing hardwork enough he got failure it will not only disheart him but also avoid trying gain to achieve success. in addition to this, bringing up children with such kind of attitude may leads to stubborn personality, which consequently destroys the character of any child emplies effect on whole life.

In conclusion, children must have idea in their mind that every thiung in this world is not achievable they should try and wrok hard to get their desired goal but they should not get disheart,

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both sides of the question and give a relevant overall view: the message may build confidence and independence, but can also make children discouraged or stubborn when they fail. The examples about succeeding at a goal and then feeling less motivated after failure help explain the main points. However, some ideas are asserted rather than fully explained. For instance, the claim that this upbringing can “destroy the character” is broad, and the link between confidence and making decisions freely needs clearer support. Your conclusion gives a sensible qualification—that children should work hard while recognising that not every goal is achievable—but could more directly summarise the balance of advantages and disadvantages. Develop each point with a specific explanation or example to make the response more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure, with an introduction, a paragraph on advantages, a paragraph on disadvantages, and a conclusion. This makes the main progression easy to follow, and signposts such as “Moreover,” “The negative side,” and “In conclusion” help identify the stages of your argument. Some connections are less clear or mechanical, however. The opening sentence of the advantages paragraph contains several ideas in one long sequence, while “Another advantage of this kind of personality development” repeats the earlier point without a smooth transition. The relationship between failure and becoming stubborn also needs to be made explicit. Use clearer topic sentences and connect each supporting explanation directly to the point it develops; vary linking expressions rather than relying mainly on formulaic transitions.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “confidence,” “motivated,” “independent,” and “stubborn personality,” and you use some less common expressions such as “disastrous effects.” However, the range is limited by repeated wording around “personality development,” “success,” and “achieve,” and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, such as “encouraged that,” “brighter side of such kind of brought-up,” and “multiple success.” Spelling errors—including “developement,” “disheart,” and “occassions”—also make the writing less fluent to read. Aim for more precise, natural combinations and check spelling carefully. For example, describe children as being “encouraged to believe” and refer to “repeated successes” or “setbacks” where appropriate.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including conditional structures such as “if a child is habitual of enjoying success… and… got failure” and a relative clause beginning “which consequently…”. These attempts show an effort to express cause and effect, but some sentence structures are difficult to control and errors sometimes obscure the intended relationship. For example, “Advantage of this situation could generate” lacks a clear grammatical subject, and “bringing up children… may leads” has incorrect verb agreement after “may.” There are also problems with articles, tense consistency, and sentence boundaries, as in the long sentence beginning “once they try to achieve.” Practise building accurate clauses first, then combine them; check subject–verb agreement, verb forms after modal verbs, and capitalisation at the start of sentences.

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