Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 6.0)

It is argued that in some traditions, children are often made to believe that they can get anything if they try to work hard. This message often carries advantages as well as disadvantages. Both are discussed below.

First and foremost, there are many advantages of telling children that they could achieve anything. One of the main benefit of telling them that their hard work would pay off is that it helps to boost their confidence. When someone is working hard these words can really help them to stay motivated to their goals which could ultimately help them to succeed. They feel supported. For instance, if someone is working hard to pass an exam and if he would hear someone telling him that he could do this it helps to build his confidence.

There are also some disadvantages that comes with this statement. One of the main disadvantage is the impact on health. Children are made to believe that they should never fail in life. If they are continuously told this they would assume that to fail in something is a negative thing and if they do fail they would be hard on themselves which would impact their overall health. However, one learns through failure but when they are told there is no room for failure they would assume that failing in life is something to be ashamed of.

In conclusion, this statement has advantage as well as disadvantage. Someone could be told that their hard work would pay off which would help them succeed but they should also be told that even if they do fail they can try again.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both sides of the question and give a relevant overall view: encouragement can build confidence and motivation, while an absolute promise may make children fear failure. The exam example helps illustrate the benefit, and the conclusion usefully recommends balancing encouragement with reassurance that failure is recoverable. However, the two main ideas are not developed equally: the advantage is explained through confidence and motivation, whereas the disadvantage is mainly asserted as an effect on health. Explain more specifically how unrealistic expectations could create pressure or disappointment, and distinguish “trying hard” from being guaranteed success. This would make the discussion more fully supported and precise.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for advantages and disadvantages, and a conclusion that returns to the central issue. Signposting such as “First and foremost,” “There are also some disadvantages,” and “In conclusion” makes the progression easy to follow. This meets the lower-band expectations securely and shows some features of stronger organisation. However, the linking is somewhat formulaic, and several ideas are placed next to one another rather than developed through clear connections—for example, “They feel supported” is brief and disconnected from the surrounding explanation. Use referencing and transitions more naturally, and build each paragraph through a clearer sequence of claim, explanation, and example.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough relevant vocabulary to communicate the main points, including “boost their confidence,” “stay motivated,” “fail,” and “overall health.” The meaning is generally clear, but the range is limited and several expressions are repetitive or imprecise, particularly repeated forms of “tell,” “hard work,” and “fail.” Some collocations are awkward, such as “work hard to their goals” and “impact on health.” More precise language would help you explain the psychological effects and the limits of effort without relying on broad wording. Aim to vary key terms and check that words combine naturally; for example, describe children as working “towards their goals” and discuss “emotional well-being” rather than using general phrases repeatedly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including conditional structures such as “if they do fail they can try again” and longer explanations using “which.” The central meaning remains understandable, but some agreement and verb-form errors recur: “One of the main benefit” and “There are also some disadvantages that comes” should use plural agreement, while “if he would hear” is not the appropriate form for this hypothetical example. Sentence boundaries and punctuation also need attention, particularly around the long sentence beginning “When someone is working hard.” Practise accurate subject–verb agreement and conditional patterns, and divide longer sentences where needed. These changes would improve control while preserving your attempts at varied structures.

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