Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In the world, there are two types of work such as hard work and smart work through which children can achieve anything. However, in some cultures, parents are only focus on hard work so that children often believe that it is the only way for the success. There are positive and negative sides of that will be discussed in the following paragraphs.

One major advantage of this belief is that it encourages to children always work even in the difficult situation. Sometimes in such situations require determination and will power to face it that helps to identify the mistakes and also give solutions to tackle the problems. Furthermore, it helps children develop self-confidence and understand the importance of dedication, which may benefit them in academics and professional lives.

On the other hand, this belief has several disadvantages. The main problem is that children may think success is granted by hard work because of that they may not be able to understand the different ways or perspectives and underestimate their skills and knowledge. Moreover, it effects on their physical and mental well-being. Hard work requires physical work and gives mental pressure for perfect leads to some serious health issue.

In conclusion, there are always two sides of hard work. positive sides such as encourage to children to never give up in any kind of situation and help in develop some skills. The other side like children may not be able to see different perspectives and have some health issues. Teachers and parents should explain about other factors for successful career that benefits to them.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both advantages and disadvantages and give a relevant overall view: the message can encourage persistence, but may also narrow children’s thinking and affect their well-being. The points about determination, self-confidence and dedication are appropriate, and you explain some possible benefits. However, several ideas are asserted rather than fully developed. For example, the claim that children may “underestimate their skills and knowledge” is not clearly connected to being told that effort can achieve anything. The health disadvantage is also broad; explain how unrealistic pressure to keep trying could lead to stress or exhaustion. Your conclusion offers a sensible recommendation to parents and teachers, but the response would be stronger if it focused more directly on the message in the question rather than introducing “hard work and smart work” as its main framing.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for advantages and disadvantages, and a conclusion. This makes the main direction easy to follow, and signposts such as “Furthermore” and “On the other hand” help connect points. The organisation is coherent, though some links are mechanical or unclear. In the opening, the shift from “two types of work” to what parents tell children does not establish the essay’s focus smoothly. Within the disadvantage paragraph, the relationship between hard work, pressure and health problems needs clearer explanation. The conclusion repeats the main points but could synthesise them more precisely. To strengthen progression, use clearer links between each claim and its explanation, and ensure references such as “this belief” consistently point to the message described in the task.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including “determination,” “self-confidence,” “dedication,” “perspectives” and “well-being.” These choices show some range beyond basic wording. However, several inaccurate or unnatural expressions make the writing less precise, such as “two types of work,” “granted by hard work,” “gives mental pressure for perfect,” and “successful career.” There are also word-form and spelling problems, including “effects” where a verb is needed and “well-being” written inconsistently. Aim for natural collocations and precise terms: for instance, describe effort as helping children “persevere” rather than suggesting it guarantees success. More accurate phrasing would make your ideas clearer and demonstrate stronger control of vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including clauses with “because” and “which,” and the overall meaning is generally recoverable. However, errors in sentence construction and verb patterns occur in several places. For example, “parents are only focus” needs a correctly formed verb, while “it encourages to children always work” has an incorrect structure after “encourages.” The sentence beginning “Sometimes in such situations require…” is also incomplete or incorrectly formed, and “children may think success is granted by hard work because of that…” needs clearer clause punctuation and construction. Articles, agreement and plural forms also need attention, as in “some serious health issue.” Practise building accurate complex sentences and check each sentence for a clear subject and correctly formed verb.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.