Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-14
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?
Student answer (Band 6.0)
In many cultures, children grow up hearing that there are no limits to what they can achieve if they are determined, this belief is intended to inspire them to pursue their dreams. However, it may also create unrealistic expectations in my opinion. This mindset is beneficial that children are taught to be passionate but the limitation of how it can also place excessive pressure on young people.
On the one hand, this approach teaches children to take responsibility for their development rather than assuming that intelligence and talent are fixed qualities, they may believe that consistent feedback can improve their performance. For example, a child who initially struggles to speak consistently in public may gradually become an effective communicator by regular practice. As a result, it encourages them to improve their performance in the areas they may lack.
On the other hand, the belief that anything is possible through hardwork alone can have negative consequences such as providing hope that success can always be acheived by individual effort only. For example, students who believe that they must achieve the highest mark through constant effort may suffer from anxiety in the long run. This may lead to personal failiure.
In conclusion, encouraging children to work hard towards their ambitions can strengthen their willingness to learn. Nevertheless, it should not be presented as a way to absolute success. Therefore, children should be educated in an early stage on how to approach a task systematically and methodically instead of completetly relying on repeated effort.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5
You address both the advantages and disadvantages and maintain a clear overall position: the message can encourage effort, but should not promise absolute success. The benefit is supported with the example of a child improving at public speaking, while the disadvantage is illustrated through students experiencing anxiety. This meets the task well, but the two sides are not equally developed: the benefit is explained in terms of responsibility and improvement, whereas the disadvantage is mainly linked to pressure and a brief reference to “personal failure.” Explain more fully how unrealistic expectations can affect children, and clarify the conditions—such as resources or circumstances—that effort alone cannot overcome. Your conclusion offers a relevant qualification, though its practical recommendation could be connected more directly to the disadvantages discussed.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The response has a clear overall structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for advantages and disadvantages, and a conclusion. “On the one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” make the progression easy to follow, and the examples are placed in the relevant paragraphs. Some connections are less smooth or precise, however. The opening sentence joins two complete ideas with a comma, and the phrase “This mindset is beneficial that…” makes the relationship between the claim and its qualification difficult to follow. The final sentence introduces systematic approaches without clearly linking them to the anxiety described earlier. Use clearer sentence boundaries and make each paragraph’s supporting explanation lead explicitly to its main point.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.0
You use an adequate range of vocabulary for the topic, including “unrealistic expectations,” “consistent feedback,” “excessive pressure,” and “systematically and methodically.” These choices help communicate the main ideas, and the meaning is generally clear. Some expressions are imprecise or unnatural, such as “the limitation of how it can,” “providing hope that success can always be achieved,” and “personal failure.” There are also spelling errors in “hardwork,” “acheived,” “failiure,” and “completetly.” These do not prevent understanding, but they reduce accuracy and control. Aim for more natural collocations and proofread carefully; for example, distinguish between effort, opportunity, and outcomes rather than implying that effort alone guarantees success.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You attempt a mix of simple and complex structures, including clauses with “who,” “that,” and “rather than,” and most of your meaning remains understandable. However, some sentence structures and punctuation are inaccurate. The opening sentence is a comma splice: “there are no limits … determined, this belief…” should be separated or joined with a suitable conjunction. “This mindset is beneficial that children are taught…” is also structurally unclear; a construction such as “It is beneficial for children to be taught…” would be more accurate. In addition, “by regular practice” needs a clearer grammatical link, and “in an early stage” should be “at an early stage.” These errors show that complex forms are not yet consistently controlled. Focus on accurate clause connections and review prepositions and sentence boundaries.
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