Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they work hard enough. While this message can motivate children to work towards their goals, it can also create unrealistic expectations. This essay will discuss both the advantages and disadvantes .

One major advantages of this message is children work hard and believe in themselves. When children understand that efforts is important for success, they may become more confident and determined to achieve their goals. For examples, a student struggles with mathematics may continue practising and improve their marks. This attitude can teach children the importance of patience, discipline and not giving up when they face difficulties.

However, there are some disadvantages, the main problem is children may think hard work always pay back but in reality success depend on several factors, including opportunities, financial condition, and health. If children work hard but fail to archieve their goals, they feel disappointed or they are not good enough to archieve. Furthermore, this message is unnecessary pressure in children and affect there mentally breakdown.

In conclusion, telling children that hard work can help them to archieve their goals can build confidence and determination . However, this message should be balance with reality check of failure, and excepting the facts which is life challenging.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both sides of the question and give a relevant example: a student who keeps practising mathematics may improve. The introduction also signals the essay’s direction, and the conclusion recognises that encouragement should be balanced with realism. However, the ideas are brief and under-developed. The disadvantages—limited opportunities, health or financial circumstances, disappointment, and pressure—are listed but not clearly explained or illustrated. The conclusion’s point about accepting life’s challenges is also unclear. The response contains 200 words, so it does not meet the 250-word minimum; this limits the space available to develop and support your ideas. Explain each main point further and add a specific example for the disadvantages.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for advantages and disadvantages, and a conclusion. Basic signposting such as “However” and “In conclusion” helps readers follow the shift between sections. Nevertheless, progression within paragraphs is limited, and some connections are unclear. For example, “Furthermore, this message is unnecessary pressure in children” does not clearly show how the pressure follows from the previous point about failure. The conclusion introduces “reality check” and “life challenging” without linking these ideas precisely to the discussion. Develop each paragraph around one main point, then explain its consequence and support it with an example. Use linking phrases accurately rather than relying mainly on a few standard transitions.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “confident,” “determined,” “opportunities,” and “disappointed,” and the reader can generally understand your main points. However, the range is limited and several noticeable word-choice, collocation, word-form, and spelling errors reduce clarity. Examples include “success depend,” “hard work always pay back,” “archieve,” and “affect there mentally breakdown.” Some phrases do not express the intended meaning naturally, particularly the final reference to a “reality check.” Build a wider set of accurate expressions for effort, achievement, setbacks, and pressure, and check spelling and word forms carefully. More precise phrasing would make your arguments easier to follow.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple sentences and longer structures, including a conditional example (“If children work hard but fail…”) and a relative clause (“a student [who] struggles with mathematics”). However, the range is limited, and errors occur frequently in basic sentence patterns, agreement, verb forms, and punctuation. For instance, “One major advantages … is children work hard” has problems with number and sentence structure; “success depend” lacks subject–verb agreement; and “they feel disappointed or they are not good enough to achieve” shifts awkwardly between clauses. The comma splice in “there are some disadvantages, the main problem is…” also needs correction. Practise building accurate complex sentences and proofread each sentence for a clear subject, verb, and complete clause.

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