Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The hard work is key to succes, many children are grew up while listening this sentence in there childhood, in many cultures the childrens are often told they can achieve every thing if the try harder. I believe its advantages otweigh its dissadvantages as it builds confidence and consistancey to achieve.

The advantages of this message are this message builds confidence in childrens from childhood, which helps them to see every goal is achievable. For example those students who believe in their capabilities will crack any exam or solve any problem more easily. Moreover it also helps students in building consistency. The consistant student will outperform many intelligent students. For example if someone is not good in numerical subjects he will try to find different methods to solve problems instead of completely giving up it.

The draw backs of this approach are. Everyone have born with different capabilities. Some are good in sports while others are good in studies. The students with limited capacity will feel an extra pressure and burden on their mind. Which will lead to mental problems like stress and anxiety in many childrens. Furthermore if someone have a passion to be football player however he does not get a good results in a mathemtics. It will lead to lowering its confidence level which will impact it performance in football match.

In conclusion, although hard work is key to get your goals, the balance approach should be taken in dealing with childrens. Additionally Emphasizing childrens to follow their passion and work hard on it will be much helpful instead of forcing them your decisions.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address both the advantages and disadvantages and state a clear view that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. The confidence and persistence points are relevant, and the examples about tackling exams and trying different methods help explain them. You also identify a plausible drawback: children may feel pressure when they cannot meet expectations. This covers the task well, but development is uneven. The benefits are explained more fully than the drawbacks, and the football example is not fully connected to the message that effort can achieve anything. To strengthen the response, explain more precisely how unrealistic expectations can affect children, and develop the concluding idea of balancing encouragement with recognition of individual abilities.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for advantages and drawbacks, and a conclusion. The progression from confidence to persistence, then to pressure, is generally easy to follow. Linking expressions such as “Moreover,” “Furthermore,” and “In conclusion” help signal the stages of the argument. However, some connections are mechanical or unclear. The drawbacks paragraph begins with the fragment “The draw backs of this approach are,” and “Which will lead to mental problems” is separated from the sentence it depends on. The final football example also needs a clearer link to the preceding point. Use complete topic sentences and connect each example explicitly to the claim it supports; this would make the organisation more consistently smooth.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of vocabulary for the topic, including “confidence,” “consistency,” “capabilities,” “pressure,” and “anxiety.” These choices allow you to discuss both benefits and risks, and some phrases, such as “lowering its confidence level,” show an attempt to express more specific effects. However, spelling and word-choice errors are noticeable and sometimes make the reader pause: “succes,” “dissadvantages,” “consistant,” and “mathemtics” are examples. Some combinations are also unnatural, including “crack any exam” and “limited capacity.” Aim for accurate spelling and more natural collocations, such as “pass an exam” and “limited ability.” This would make your vocabulary more precise and reliable while preserving the relevant range you already attempt.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including a conditional example beginning “if someone is not good in numerical subjects” and a relative clause in “students who believe in their capabilities.” This shows some range, but control is inconsistent, and errors occur across the response. Examples include “many children are grew up,” “Everyone have born,” and “if someone have a passion,” where verb forms and subject–verb agreement are faulty. Articles and plurals also need attention, as in “a good results” and “in many childrens.” Sentence boundaries are sometimes incorrect: “The students with limited capacity will feel an extra pressure and burden on their mind. Which will lead…” should be joined or recast. Practise accurate basic clauses before adding longer structures.

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