Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Children in certain cultures are used to hearing that anything can be achieved if they work hard enough. This is usually done to boost their self-esteem, however it might make them highly vulnerable to lossess in the long run.

Forming a resilient mindset at a young age is the biggest advantage of giving children this message. A message of this sort teaches them about the significance of persistence and hard work. It motivates them to work hard towards their goals in life, while also signifying the importance of not quitting. For instance, a child who has heard this message a lot would study hard for their exams as they know that hard work is strongly linked to success.

This message makes children susceptible to hardships in life, as they think working hard guarantees success. This may make it difficult for them to handle even small losses in life, as they heard hard work always pays off. And when they face a hardship, it might be really difficult for them to get out of it as they were used to succeeding. For instance, if the same child fails their exams after studying nonstop for days, they might get way more upset than kids who did not study as much as them.

To conclude, the message itself is meant to motivate children to work harder. However, a small hurdle in life may thrash their confidence as their hard work may not help them succeed at everything.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both the advantage and disadvantage, and your position is clear: the message can encourage persistence but may leave children less prepared for setbacks. The exam example supports the benefit, while the child failing after studying illustrates the risk. However, the two sides are not developed equally: the disadvantage is explained in more detail, whereas the benefit mainly focuses on studying hard and does not explore other effects or limits. The claim that children may struggle with “even small losses” could also be explained more carefully. The response is six words below the required minimum, so it does not meet the task’s length requirement. Develop the benefit further and add a little explanation or qualification to make the discussion more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, one paragraph for each side, and a conclusion. The progression from the benefit to the drawback is easy to follow, and examples are placed where they support the relevant point. This meets the lower-band expectation of coherent organisation and shows some stronger control through clear paragraphing and links such as “For instance” and “To conclude.” However, cohesion is occasionally mechanical: “This message” and “This may” repeatedly begin or connect ideas, and the conclusion largely restates the introduction rather than drawing the two sides together. Some links between claims could be made more explicit—for example, explain how the belief in guaranteed success leads to difficulty coping with failure. Varying references and developing transitions would make the progression more flexible.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range to discuss the topic, including relevant expressions such as “resilient mindset,” “persistence,” “susceptible to hardships,” and “guarantees success.” These choices help communicate both sides of the argument, and the meaning remains clear. There are also some imprecise or informal choices that limit control: “lossess” is misspelled, “way more upset” is conversational, and “thrash their confidence” is an unnatural collocation. “A message of this sort” and repeated use of “hard work” also make the vocabulary less varied. Aim for more precise academic phrasing and check spelling and collocations. For example, describe children as “more distressed” and say that a setback may “undermine their confidence.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, and several sentences are controlled clearly, including “A message of this sort teaches them about the significance of persistence and hard work.” The conditional structure in “if the same child fails their exams … they might get…” also communicates a hypothetical outcome effectively. Some errors in grammar and punctuation remain. In the opening, “This is usually done to boost their self-esteem, however…” joins two independent clauses with only a comma; use a full stop or a semicolon before “however.” The sentence beginning “And when they face a hardship” is a fragment because it lacks a main clause. There is also a shift from “a child” to “they” in the example. Review sentence boundaries and maintain consistent reference while continuing to use varied structures.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.