Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Most of children in different cultures are often told that they can achieve anything if they work hard for it, by saying this to a child can encourage him and helps him in building his strong and resilience personality. It can be very benefical for a child to start thinking that he can get whatever he wants by working hard for it but sometimes is can be difficult for him to move on from failures.

Firstly, it is very necessary for a child to learn about the importance of hard work. To acheive a goal in your life it is cruical that you motivate yourself and do your best . If a child is told that he should work hard and remove failutre from his mind, he will not only get stronger mindset but also get a taste of winning, which is important for achieving success in his life.

However, to encourage children to work hard is something different from forcing them to do their best. Touturing your child on his failure by saying that he should try harder everytime he fails, can damage the confidence of the child. It will be difficult for him to cope with failure. Failure itself is not something to be ashamed of.

In conlusion, telling a child that he can achieve anything by working hard is a benefical for the upbringing of the child although it can be proved harmful if forced. Failure is a part of life and it should be important to learn the value of failure without obssessing with hard work.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses both sides of the question and gives a clear overall view: hard work can build resilience, while pressure to keep trying may make failure harder to cope with. The first body paragraph explains the benefit through motivation and the “taste of winning”; the second gives a relevant disadvantage by distinguishing encouragement from forcing a child. However, some points are asserted rather than fully explained. For example, clarify how learning from failure can help children, and explain more precisely when the message becomes harmful. The conclusion restates the position but could synthesise the two sides more clearly. The response meets the task requirements, but fuller development and support for some ideas would strengthen it.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay has a coherent overall arrangement: an introduction, one paragraph on the advantage, one on the disadvantage, and a conclusion. “Firstly,” “However,” and “In conclusion” make the main shifts easy to follow, and the contrast between encouragement and pressure gives the discussion a useful organising idea. Some connections are less smooth within sentences, particularly the opening, where the initial claim runs into “by saying this to a child” without a clear grammatical link. The conclusion also repeats earlier points rather than drawing them together. To improve progression, use clearer links between each claim and its explanation, and make references such as “it” and “this” more precise so readers can immediately identify the idea being discussed.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary is sufficient to communicate the main ideas, with relevant terms such as “resilience,” “mindset,” “cope with failure,” and “upbringing.” There is also some attempt to express distinctions, especially between encouraging a child and forcing them. However, the range is limited and several spelling and word-choice errors reduce accuracy, including “benefical,” “acheive,” “cruical,” “failutre,” and “obssessing.” Some phrases are also unnatural or imprecise, such as “remove failure from his mind” and “tutouring your child on his failure.” Build a more accurate range of collocations for discussing effort, expectations, and setbacks, and proofread spelling carefully. More precise phrasing would make the argument sound clearer and more natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response uses both simple sentences and some attempts at complex structures, including “although it can be proved harmful if forced” and “If a child is told…”. The main ideas are generally understandable, but some grammatical errors affect clarity. The opening sentence is a run-on: “Most of children…,” followed by “by saying this…” without a complete, well-linked structure. There are also errors in articles and agreement, as in “a benefical” and “it can be very benefical… but sometimes is can be difficult,” as well as inconsistent pronoun reference between “a child,” “him,” and “your.” Use shorter, complete sentences when needed, and check articles, subject–verb agreement, and sentence boundaries. Greater control of these patterns would make the complex ideas easier to follow.

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