Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It's a very fascinating topic because in many culters our elders often told that you can achieve anything if you try hard , but they do not disclose how to work hard and how to do work hard, If a critical and logical mind hear this type of advice , he will stop listen and process it and then ask question from elders , why is it important to work hard ? why are you suggesting me to work hard , and if you are suggesting me to work hard , why did you not follow this?

So, let's talk about advantages of these type of suggestions.

Working hard can lead you towards your destination and always keeps you motivated because the person who is not struggling , who is not working hard can distract from his goals , visions, and from dream.

Working hard could be something which can give you a good life as well , you will start winning and get your reward in this way , working hard in right way , with right and logical stratigies , you con do and achieve any thing in your life,

Our elder know that they have not done hard work in there lives and spent there whole life in difficult days , so they advice there child to do what they have not done in there life,they want us to spend good life.

Now let's move towards the disadvantages of these types of suggestions.

Working hard is might be a good advice ,but yeah, Working hard in wrong direction can lead you towards nothing,

Without having knowledge about ,how to work hard and how can we do things perfect, is like yelling iin front of a person who is deaf ,

So to achieve anything, we should not rely only on hard working , we shoud also rely on smart work , So many of the time, Children start doing hardwork because of there parents / elders, they forget to show smartness and to learn smart work as well.

So, we should learn how to work smart not hard.Thank you

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both advantages and disadvantages and maintain a generally relevant focus on the message that effort can lead to success. The benefits you identify include motivation, reaching goals and improving children’s future prospects; the drawbacks include working in the wrong direction and neglecting “smart work.” However, the discussion is only partly developed: the advantages overlap, and the disadvantages are not clearly connected to how this message affects children. The opening also shifts into questioning elders rather than establishing a clear position on the message itself. To strengthen the response, explain specific outcomes—for example, how the belief may build resilience but could also create unrealistic expectations or self-blame when a child fails—and support each point with a clear example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable overall structure, moving from an introduction to advantages, disadvantages and a concluding recommendation. Phrases such as “let's talk about advantages” and “move towards the disadvantages” help signal the sections. However, progression within those sections is limited: several sentences repeat the idea that hard work leads to success, while the relationship between the opening questions and the main discussion is unclear. Some linking is mechanical, and the final sentence introduces “smart work” without fully drawing together the earlier points. Use clearer paragraphing for each main idea, then develop it with an explanation or example. More precise referencing and fewer repeated transitions would make the argument easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant vocabulary, including “motivated,” “goals,” “logical strategies” and “smart work,” so the reader can understand the main ideas. However, the range is limited and several expressions are repeated, particularly “work hard” and “achieve anything.” There are also noticeable spelling and word-choice problems, such as “culters,” “stratigies,” “con do,” and “advice” where the verb “advise” is needed. Phrases such as “working hard in wrong direction” and “spend good life” are understandable but not natural collocations. Build a wider set of accurate expressions for effort, success and expectations, and check spelling and word forms carefully. This would make the argument clearer and more precise.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including conditional structures such as “if you are suggesting me to work hard” and clauses beginning with “because” and “without.” However, complex sentences are often faulty, and frequent errors can make the reader pause. Examples include “our elders often told” instead of a correctly formed passive, “Working hard is might be,” and “Children start doing hardwork because of there parents,” which has problems with sentence structure, agreement and possessive forms. Punctuation is also inconsistent, especially in the long opening sentence, where several ideas run together. Practise building shorter, accurate sentences first, then combine them with controlled clauses. Check verb forms, articles, plurals and sentence boundaries during editing.

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